i think i'll write that down

Oh Christmas

2011-12-13T14:52:00.001-05:00

I love Christmas. It's my favorite season. It's so much fun getting prepared for the big day. From the tree to the decorations, to the music, parities, presents, family gatherings, foods. It's all great! I love it all. It also means halfway through the year, meaning summer is coming back!! WOOHOO. I love summer.
I have been thinking a lot this week about memories. It seems every sight, smell, or song takes me back to being a kid. It's been kind of hard. Does anyone hear me on this? Is it just me, or are more people burning wood in a wood stove so I can think of chopping, stacking, and watching Paw Paw walk across that frozen ground to have heat in his house? Or is the song, "it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas" being played more this year than last so i can think of Grandmaw singing it every time I would help her put up her decorations. Or Christmas Movies I have seen every year for years are now making me cry as I can relate to the situations these people are in.
It's been a strange few couple of weeks. I don't know what to think of it, but I have had fun remembering. I won't get sad on happy times. Do I yearn for those days when everyone I love was still a live? Yes! But I have to look BEYOND what was and look for what's to come. Look beyond. Pastor Furtick taught me this new, old word. NEVERTHELESS. Meaning although I am in this spot right now, nevertheless, God is good and he has it all figured out. I will accept where I am, and go forward to where I am going. NEVERTHELESS! My new favorite word. Although I miss the old days of Christmas pass, nevertheless, I will enjoy and embrace the Christmases to come!

I love Christmas. It's the most wonderful time of the year!

What's Happening

2011-11-06T17:45:00.001-05:00

Oh man. What a month! If you don't know I have another blog for basketball (that updates daily! what?!), on top of keeping up with my school website, the athletic website, run club organization, waiting tables, taking pictures for the school, etc... But life is great! Life is starting to slow down a little and I have been able to get back to my routine of teaching, coaching and waiting tables on the weekend.
I have several friends that teach in other countries and I must say my heart is still here! I love teaching the kids in the USA. They need some Jesus. You know that old saying, you can't take care of others until you take care of your self. I think USA does a great job giving to everyone else, but often we neglect our own needs. Can a crumbly foundation hold up a house? NOPE! My mission is teaching and coaching. That's my heart! Now, to find someone with the same heart! God has someone in mind that has the same mission heart as me! I wish I had more to share, but I don't know where to start so read the other blogs, websites and if anything big happens, I'll put it up! What?!

Impression Makers

2011-10-03T22:51:00.000-04:00

There are people who come into my life that leave impressions. Some are family members, some are coworkers, some are strangers and some are friends. Recently I have been blessed to make a new friend, named Mike. Mike's life has been completely changed. He has the history of anyone who has been abused by their father, raised in a violent home/school, in and out of jail, battled with addictions, lost his family and ended up in a place where the only place he could look was up. UP! Knowing Mike now you would never know he has battled these pains, these trails, this road. We recently celebrated the fact he got his license back after having a few DWIs. But I don't want you to judge Mike. He is a walking example of the power of Christ being lived out on this earth. The power of the kingdom of God on earth. I met Mike in the Diner, continued to be her waitress for many months, then would see him in there later at night and would just start general conversation with. As our conversations deepened i learned it wasn't until he finally gave all power, all his life, all his 'control', over to God and let him take care of it. Mike will be the first to tell you he can't do it on his own but he isn't going to worry about what might happen because he knows that his power comes from God, the God that created the world. Sometimes I get discourages, sometimes I struggle with my own addictions and habits and in those times I remember Mike. I remember his life and how the power of God gives him strength and it's that same power in me that gives me strength. Thank you Jesus. So Mike is an impression maker.
Rebekah is also someone who has recently left a lasting impression on my life. There is power and freedom in forgiveness. It's a long story with a few years in the making but I was recently asked if I would accept an apology from someone I didn't really know. To be quite honest, it was very surprising to me and I would have never thought anything about it if she had never apologized but she did. Now, I won't go into detail but let me just say impression maker. We all have times when we do something wrong and pride will get in the way and cause us to make reasons in excuses as to how we are right, then a long period of time will pass when we think its to long now to ask for forgiveness and we never do. Well, it's not to late. No matter how long the time that has passed forgiveness is forgiveness. Through Rebekah's act of obedience to the spirit I myself have had recent encounters where I had to ask for forgiveness. I will tell you, Rebekah came to mind each time when i didn't want to humble my own self and face the music of my wrongs. But let me tell you without her simple act asking for forgiveness I know my own recent weeks would have been bigger battles in swallowing my own pride. Rebekah is an impression maker.
We all leave impressions on this earth and in the lives of the people we interact with. What impression do you leave. Let it be one that brings glory to this earth. Be the Mike. Be the Rebekah. Be an Impression Maker!

Speak.

2011-07-10T00:10:00.000-04:00

I do not like to be lied to. I do not like to be deceived. I do not like for people to say one thing and not truly mean what they are saying. Do not try and spare my feelings with lies, I would rather hear the truth. Do not give up just because it's hard and do not live a double life. I will try to the end but when every stone has been turned, every word has been said, and every means of effort exhausted, even I will turn in the towel. Tell me now, don't tell me later. But make sure what you say now is true, not just a lie to pacify the time. You speak. You speak hollow words. No my friend. Speak what is true, speak what is real, speak what is truly on your heart.

summer

2011-06-28T07:56:00.000-04:00

This is my first summer in the states since college. I must say I haven't had a summer vacation in a long time. It's nice being able to wake up, run, read the word, drink coffee, type a blog, paint, sit by a pool, hang out with O, and work the diner. That's my summer. It's amazing. 3 days off a week!! I don't get three days off in a month. So, no good jungle stories this summer. But, I do think something big is going to happen. Don't know what but something. Either in my life or in the life of someone close to me. Because my big question has been why am I not in Costa? Why am I here? I don't know if I will get one answer. I will say God is at work. My prayer has been Lord work in me so I can work in them. I have so many relationships that I am building with people who are open to something, who are searching for something, who are ready. For example, I wait table at a diner and the other day one of my customers and I were conversing when we got on the subject of who God is and how he sees us. Well, let me say this scares me to death. Sometimes I get to this point where I wonder what to say next, how to act. So I have to stay in tune to the spirit and how the spirit is speaking to me.
I am still praying for my Greek family! Lord, is that why I'm in Concord? Maybe!
Granted I'm not in a foreign land serving for Jesus but I will say I believe my service here this summer is going to impact my lives than I know. So this is my prayer, Lord keep me focused, keep my grounded, keep me in you and you in me! And in the school year when I am slammed busy, I feel as though I don't keep this focus. God is so Great. He is moving. Watch out world! Watch out Concord!

a rant

2011-06-26T18:01:00.001-04:00

Really? Am I wrong? Am I that wrong? How could I have been that off? I'm not one to open up. I'm not one to just let people in easily unless I'm sure I'll be treated okay. I don't like jokes so I don't play them on people. I don't like to be lied to, misled, or take advantage of. So, how was I fooled? I don't know. But as it goes: trick me once your a fool, trick me twice I'm a fool. And guess what buddy row... I ain't no fool!
Bad Grammar..> i know. But i'm just saying.

I'm not a spring chicken anymore.

2011-06-20T08:39:00.000-04:00

I have multiple stories to share about my mini vacation with the rents over this past weekend. I think I should add the fact, I have not went on vacation with my parents since before college. So, i was a little nervous about how I would do spending 24 hours with my momma, but I had a blast. It was nice to be a "kid" again. To have someone over me to make decisions. It was a nice break. I think as a kid I was so gun hoe about not having my parent make decisions, but now I can appreciate a break from being an adult.

Story One: The groundhog. Before we even left the Lasley plantation I was laughing my face off at my parents. Dutchess, the farm dog, was barking her heart out at a pile of dirt. My daddy being the curious george that he is had to figure out what was pestering this dog. Well, it was a ground hog. You must know that my daddy was a deep down hatred for ground hogs. He thinks they play games with him on his many endeavors to trap and destroy the little pests. So, here's my knight and shinning armor of a father poking a stick at this little ground hog, while momma and myself wait patiently in the driver side opened door car. (the driver door being open is a key part to this story.) The ground hog is scared trying to figure out where to go, my daddy is jumping around wondering where it is going, and all the while I am thinking what is he trying to do. Daddy takes a kick at the ground hog... and misses. Hit's the dirt. Straight up kicked the dirt. Then tried again, and kicked the little pest. Not to be deterred, that little rodent went back to the other side of the dirt pile only to be followed by my father. Who, got his stick out and poked the ground hog one more time. Well, this time the ground hog took off. Straight towards our car. Straight towards the open door on the car. Straight towards my Momma, who has by this time unbuckled her seat belt, has her hand on the door handle and ready to jump out of the vehicle and let the ground hog have it. While Momma is trying to flee, daddy is now running after the rodent with is hands in front, as though he's trying to catch it, saying, "oh no... not the door. Not the car." I'm in the back seat in tears from laughing. This is my family. This is the start of my weekend. Oh my....
Well the ground hog did not jump in the car (good thing because Momma would have blamed daddy for leaving the door open!) it ducked down below the chassis towards the barn, only to mock my father another day.

Story 2:... Apollo's Chariot.

disappointment

2011-06-16T20:01:00.000-04:00

Disappointment comes in many forms. Not getting an A on a paper, rain on a swim day, etc... Disappointment sometimes comes from people. For me I have been disappointed by few people in my life but each time has been the same situation. So I have often times asked, "why does it always happen like this to me?" But the question i should ask is, "what am I supposed to learn but haven't mastered yet." Because, if I had learned my lesson this same disappointment would quit happening. The solution is easy. Keep your focus. It's not what are you living for, but Who are you living for. I think each time I start to look at the what and not the Who, is when the what becomes ammunition for the enemy to use. Event's happen that test ones faith, but my faith is still growing. It's still deepening. I am still learning what authentic, true, undeterred faith really looks like. So God... you know my heart, maybe you read my blog but... I've learned my lesson. 3rd time's a charm. Thank you for the kick in the butt and wiper wipe on my windshield. I see. I have learned my lesson. In every situation, in every relationship, make you number one. Make you priority. Make you my focus and "the things of life will grown strangely dim in the light of your glory and grace."

writer's block blocked by words

2011-06-15T09:17:00.000-04:00

Writers block from way to much to say... Organized thoughts are on the way. And boy do I have some crazy junk to get out of my brain, heart and spirit!

New Friends... God knows when to send them!

2011-06-03T17:52:00.000-04:00

God has really been teaching me something. I don't know what it is but it's something. Patience, reliance, affirmation, or just plain listen. So I wish I could explain what is going on but it's something that will not benefit and only cause more questions. But you know, about the time I get down He puts people in my life that remind me what is up. So, the past few weeks I have really loved getting to know one of the servers I work with. I must say we can be good friends. She helps me see things in my relationships I don't want to face. And I help her by knowing exactly how she is feeling. It's been an interesting past couple of weeks. But as I have said before, I will wait. Peace is Peace. No pressure. Not forced or manufactured. It is something that will come. I just have to wait for some growing up.

my mind at the moment...

2011-05-15T20:11:00.000-04:00

There is no purpose behind this blog than to just vent. So, what am i doing? Really? What? I teach school, coach a bazillion sports, and wait tables. Not to mention run, hang out with some greeks, and volunteer at church. So, why is it that sometimes i'm lonely? It would seem I have everyone and anyone around me at any given time, and I do, but I'm the only one experiencing this life. I'm the only one that is sharing the experience with me. And I'm not complaining, I'm just saying... I would love to not feel as though this crazy life thing I'm going through was a solo experience. Just when I think it might not be, I get discouraged at the circumstances. Really? But I need to not look at what I don't have, and rejoice in all i do have. Complete freedom! Own space. No answering to anyone. Random trips. No planning around others. Sounds kind of selfish... but hey that's my life. I guess there is good and bad. But sometimes i would like to try the earlier one! haha

on the by-u pt.1

2011-05-08T12:27:00.003-04:00

Spring break was a much needed break of all sorts. I spent my time on a boat, in a river, on a rope swing, eating craw fish, walking around a big city, cheering on a few baseball games, having some special punch, celebrating a birthday, running in a town not familiar to runners, meeting some die hard rebels, and reflecting on where I am and what I want.

I was in Louisiana with some pretty cool people, if I do say. It was nothing short of amazing. After spending a Friday in a cold, rainy, not a day for Carowinds, North Carolina spring day, the warm humidity of Louisiana was a nice welcome when I stepped of the plane that night to be welcomed by a missed familiar face. So in the Heather clock it was 1am... well, Baton Rouge time was 12am, but regardless at that point I had been awake for 19 hours, yet that didn't dampen the intensity of wanting the explore this new place. So my first hours in Louisiana was spent with J.Wax walking along the Mississippi River in Baton Rouge learning about the Mafia, Riverboats, and Casinos. I had the undying desire to pull out some Twain and quote Huck Finn, but I thought that might me weird... so i refrained.
Stop Two was LSU. Yep, the famous LSU. It was freaking amazing. I visioned the hustle and bustle of a football game, the roar of screaming fans after a touchdown, corn hole tournaments, and the aroma of illegal beverages filling the lots around the stadium. They have a Tiger. Yep, Mike the Tiger. Chilling in his mini-NC Zoo look at me pin. Honestly, he has a pretty good life. Could you image the stories he could tell if he spoke English? I learned about the Lakes and got my first taste of "the deep south." Remember, I am a Dixie kid (meaning country and southern) but these people... whew they put a whole new understanding on deep south. I was a little sad to see just how raciest everything still is. Keep in mind I can appreciate a good joke like anyone else, but I see past the color of skin. Hello, I look Hispanic at the moment. The color doesn't make a person! But, it was interesting to see how the state was formed with a very narrow mindset and how many of those ways of thinking exist today.
So, we leave LSU heading down Hwy 12 to good ole D.S., LA and by now it's 2:30 (3:30 my time) I'm going on like 22 hours of being awake.. and crashing. Justin was filling me in on all this info about Denham, and by then the conversation consisted of him speaking and me responding with uh-huh, yeah, humm, uh-huh. I think he finally gave up speaking because he could tell I was pretty much done!
So, I am in Louisiana for 3 hours, and already I love it. The history, the knowledge, and the company. Spring break is only 8 hours in and I was thinking "thank you LORD!" And, I have 4 more days. All, of which will come after I crash for the night!

more by-u adventures to come....

Now Driver...

2011-04-28T21:49:00.000-04:00

I once heard, "there is rest in the knowledge of not knowing what's ahead." Well, no offense to Cathy Bennington and her wealth of knowledge, but i do believe on any road there are sign, signals and sometimes flashing lights. Granted, you may be on an old country road, sandwiched between wheat fields and and cows, but even these roads let you know when a curve is coming. So, my question is: What's on this road? At the moment I can't see what's ahead. I don't know what or if there is anything past the approaching hill. All I know is I'm on it. I have passed many green lights, seen some caution signs and now sit at a yield sign. Yield signs are crazy. With a yield sign you can stop or blow right through with a quick glance to make sure it's safe. But you have to think. You have to decide what to do. You have to keep moving regardless. But I'm on a road where I'm the passenger. I am not the driver. I have to wait. Wait... Wait... Wait... So far, this road has been crazy. It's been a smooth ride. It's been surprisingly comfortable. But what's ahead? What has this road I've been on been preparing me for? What has this drive taught me? What signs have I passed? But it's not up to me. It's up to the driver. I just have to know when to get out of the car. I have to know when to speak up and direct. I have to listen.

"there is rest in the knowledge of not knowing what's ahead..." but don't miss the signs that prelude what my possibly come in the future. Now Driver.... where are we going?

tears and tomatoes

2011-04-21T15:27:00.000-04:00

This past week I was able to plant 60 of the 200 tomato plants I have to help provide fresh, local, vine ripe, organically grown tomatoes for two local restaurants. After preparing the soil and digging my holes I stated setting out the plants in prep of planting them. Well, that wasn't the problem. The tears came when I knelt down, picked up the plant and placed it int the hole. MY mind instantly flashed back to my family's patriarch kneeling in orange county clay, with his blue pants, mud covered brown brogans, thin worn out carolina blue button shirt, gently placing each tomato plant in the land that represented his entire life. I see Paw Paw as I myself is kneeling in the dirt planting my own plants and I begin to weep. Tears as strong and fresh as the day he died. Tear up over the tomatoes. Wishing he was right beside me helping me put them in the ground. So, the first 10 plants have extra tears of love and I bet these will produce the sweetest tomatoes!

air amount

2011-04-15T08:18:00.000-04:00

"God is bigger than the air you breathe..." Think about that. The amount of air that surrounds you. The amount of air that you take in on a daily basis. The amount of air that is on this earth and continues to be produced by plants. God is bigger than that! Sometimes, I forget just how big he is. Just how powerful he is. Yesterday, I started to reflect on where I am. Where I am going. What I am doing. What I want to be doing. And why I'm not doing what I want or what I am supposed to be doing. Along with this reflection I briefly started to get overwhelmed by the responsibilities, the desires, the uncertainties of what's to come. As soon as the gasped breaths came, they fled at the calming arms of Christ. It was as though he said, "Heather, I got you. Don't you know how big I am? I got you!" I won't lie. Sometimes I stopped and think, "Lord, Here? Really Here? Why not him? Will I ever be settled?" and an array of many other thoughts. Those thoughts... I could choose to dwell on them or I could continue to renew my mind on what is true. What will always last. And that is simply... God's got me. He has it all. He has it all planned. Rest in his arms. Rest in his hands. Just rest. "Heather, I got you!" Good to know :)

my teaching philosophy.

2011-04-09T18:33:00.001-04:00

Well, it's been a while since a post but let me explain the reasoning in this. Between coaching volleyball 5 days a week, working 9 hours Saturday and Sunday waitressing, teaching 9-4 five days a week, and attempting to stay in great running shape, along with sleeping, enjoying being outside as much as possible, and trying to help with track (which hasn't happened as much as i'd like)... i really haven't had time to put thought to keyboard. But as this Saturday afternoon is clouding up with the approaching summer thunder, I am taking time to write. Have no fear my thoughts the past few weeks have been abundant, and many but I have one thought that has really dug deep on me the past few days.

My teaching philosophy. It was asked of me when i interviewed for my first job and to be honest, I didn't have one. Could I truly have my OWN philosophy without ever really having a class that I educated? Could I really have a any idea, insight or opinion in the education system? I think not. But as my experience increases, my teaching philosophy is starting develop.

I have had the opportunity to teach tested subjects, along with a non tested subject in my 4 years of teaching experience. Math is a very hard core, prove what you know on a MC, TF, or short answer pen and paper test. Where the fun of numbers. The fun of learning. The fun of going to school is sucked out of the class just as the stress on the teacher is pushed in.
This past year I have been placed in a non-tested subject. Where I have had the freedom to cover the curriculum without the added pressure of having to perform a certain way, for a certain group, on a certain portion of material. I must add how liberating this feeling is, to be able to teach to teach and the students can learn to learn. That's the way I started this year. "hey kids, guess what, right now everyone has an 'A'. How do you like that? There will be no written test, no final exam, rather you learning. I just want you to learn. Learn how to take care of yourself. your pass and fail will be the quality of life you endure. A good grade will equal a very healthy life, a bad grade will be a very poor health, bed ridden life."
So, I've been encouraged to see my kids showing appreciation in others, respecting the staff, showing good character, talking out their problems instead of fighting, drinking white milk, eating more fruits and veggies at lunch, restating the harms of drugs, and truly applying what they learn. So I believe teaching is when you can see the practical application of what was taught being lived through the students.

Here's my beef because of the grief I have gotten from other teachers...So, a number on a report card is a number. I will not have a kid make a 75 in my class because they didn't get their rules signed, or they didn't bring back a paper. That shows nothing! That does not accurately portray the class. What was taught. Really, did you teach the kids how to get a paper signed and bring it back? I know I didn't? If the class was on how to get paper signed by all means, take a grade on it.

Now, with that philosophy, I get judged... a lot. Maybe it's a crazy way of thinking, but it makes since to me! Maybe it's different from traditional school grades, but HELLO... school classes have changed, so should our grading systems and methods.

So, by all means, ridicule me for not giving a test, or a grade on a stupid paper coming back signed, and I will show you how my kids are making lifestyle changes that will make them healthy, productive, contributors to society. No Test. What an idea. Let's learn! What a better idea. So, step out of the box and learn with me.

if you really knew me...

2011-03-14T13:57:00.000-04:00

If you really knew me is a show on MTV that has recently caught my attention. In Health class we are currently learning about Mental and Social Health. Well, I have decided to make it more a focus on Character and Integrity. So, my kids are learning Jesus and don't even know it! But, today I kicked off the lesson with an episode it you really knew me. Which was then followed by some discussion questions. The class was AMAZING. I have yet to see a class of kids so tuned into a show. They were completely engaged to the kids on the screen. I saw kids uncomfortable, I saw kids crying, I saw kids who were in awe. To follow up the activity I had the kids write a brief journal based on discussion questions I had created. The response was unreal. For example:
If you really knew me you would know..
"my parents fight all the time"
"i hate how fat i am"
"i'm funny because I want to laugh.
'i am lonely because no one is home.:
'I hate that my dad and mom divorced"
"i cry every night still over the fact my momma died."
"i judge others because i judge myself"
"I am all by myself and noone cares"

These are just an example as to what our kids have going through their brain. I have said it before but my Sun Stand Still Prayer to to help raise up a generation of restoration. To believe in their potential to change the world.

Hey Haters

2011-03-02T11:08:00.002-05:00

Click on the Below Link (Hey Haters). Read the Blog and Watch the VIDEO!!!!

Hey Haters

a clanking spoon

2011-02-23T10:32:00.000-05:00

My rambunctious class of 7th grade students came into my classroom Wednesday morning to a different tune. Believe me I wish I had to tell them get started on your morning journal, have a seat, lets get to work, but not this morning. All I hear is my spoon clanking against my oatmeal cup, and sniffles. All I see are red, blood shot, wet eyes. I have a class of 28 7th graders staring at the board life less. Their emotions and feelings are evident. They miss their friend. The boy they went to school with for 5 years in elementary school. The boy they played basketball with in the street. The boy that they thought they would see this weekend at a birthday party. The boy that is no longer around. Death Sucks. It Sucks. There is no way around it. No sugar coat. It hurts. What hurts me is the pain I see in them. This student was redistricted to a neighboring middle school yet I hurt too. This kid. 13 years in. An entire life ahead. An age where they think, "this won't happen to me" and then it does. Clank... Clank... Clank... so is my spoon in my oatmeal. Now... do I teach? Nope. I give them paper... let them sit... Here I am. Typing away. Watching. These kids are hurting. They are writing. They are drawing. They are learning to deal. They are learning a lesson I could never teach. Only one that is learned with experience. Clank... Clank.. Clank. The worst sound in the world.

who are you

2011-02-14T16:01:00.000-05:00

Have I told ya'll how much I love my job? Seriously, I love everyday. I love every challenge. I love the craziness that comes with each kid. The good and the bad! One of the last units I have to plan for health is a Character Unit. Character? you ask. Yep. In a society that has given up on respect, I'm teaching it. So, I'm pumped. I have goals. I have visions. One kid at a time. There are 450 lives I touch every nine weeks directly, and the remaining 450 I influence simply by my attitude and the extra circulars. Don't read to much into these previous statements, I'm not at all trying to seem like some super hero, I'm just saying... I have a huge responsibility and with that a very large need for prayer. What can you help me pray for? Well, first off Strength. I need guidance and wisdom in each word, action, and lesson I teach (purposely or just by being a teacher). They can't know him unless we show him! I am not quitting on changing a generation. I am not quitting on changing what is culturally acceptable. This is a generation of Possibility and Promise. Prayer to infuse purpose into each life. This is my mission field. This is my prayer! Pray for me on this mission field!

good friends

2011-02-02T10:56:00.000-05:00

There is nothing better in this world than a good friend. Let me explain on this. A good friend is there when you need them, gives advice (good and bad), knows you better than anyone, can read you from the look on your face, and will call you out on things you don't want to hear. Erin called me out on rejoicing. I am at the age where it's hard to find single, childless friends. I am also at the point where I have lost the companionship of rejoicing in what God is doing. The celebrating. I was starting to loose the joy of celebrating in the little ways God is working through me into the lives of the kids. Erin busted me on that. So... I'm going to bust you. No matter how crazy the day is, take time to celebrate in the little ways God is working. It could be the truth you spoke over a kid. It could have been the way you showed extra kindness to the boy who really got on your nerves today. It may even be the comment, "your not like most" leading to the response, "it's Jesus." Celebrate what God is doing. Big and Small. Because when you celebrate, you are praising Him for all he is in you and through you!

I'm a Runner

2011-01-19T16:03:00.001-05:00

I don't know if I've ranted about this before, but here it goes again if I have. I was sitting in a meeting today when the topic or running a 5k was brought to the table. And then there was the statement, "you know there are 5Ks all the time. You don't really have to run. You can walk if you want."
WHAT!!! WALK???? What happened to the dignity of a race? Where is the astonishment of running a marathon gone? Where is the pride of accomplishment in a competition? It's now a "well walk it." No!! It's a race. A Race. A hard core, run all out, I want to win race. Where pain is expected when you signed up. Where the desire to beast everyone is running through every vein and breath of struggled air. A race is not a fund raising, shirt wearing, look what i did even though i walked it but my shirt says a run, event. It's a race. Like an elementary school recess competition who's the fastest RACE!!! Don't you dare diminish my passion. You can't walk it, unless a walk is the hardest you can go. When you just walk to say you competed an event you are spitting in my face of how hard I've trained. Of the time sacrificed training, running, soaking in Epsom salt. You can walk. NO THANK YOU! Walk at home... on a treadmill or on a sidewalk, but don't dare where a race shirt that states run where you just walked for the fun of it.

freezing

2010-12-24T00:07:00.001-05:00

Dear Global Warming,
Incase you have forgotten, you're supposed to be happening. Please come back to North Carolina. Thank you and you are amazing!

Love,
A Cold Person

definition

2010-12-21T16:06:00.000-05:00

After 6 months of up in the air, what's the definition, and where are we now pondering, I finally have a clear definition. What a relief!!! You never know exactly how much energy and time is spent on trying to figure out what something is based on the idea of what it could be. Well... I must stay, defining is a pretty easy way to clear up any assumptions, false interpretations, or just plain confusion. I will say it's bittersweet, and Erin can very easily say I told you so, but hey the hardest lessons are the most fun to learn!!

35 steps

2010-12-19T20:40:00.000-05:00

My entire life I have walked the same path for years. From the back door of my parent's house to Maw Maw and Paw Paw's back stoop. Saturday I was walking this familiar path when it hit me at some point in time this path will cease to be walked. The familiar steps to avoid a puddle, hole, or limb will end. Maw Maw will no longer be there and my 35 steps will stop. Who will be there? So I started to think about the steps I have taken to their house for my entire life. Big steps, little steps, quick running steps, or slow dragging steps. Well, those steps have in a way directed the steps in my life. Have directed my path. Have made me who I am by who is a the final destination in both directions. 35 steps to Maw Maw and Paw Paw.... 35 steps back to Momma and Daddy. All of whom have built me. I think I will miss the leaves with pecans in the winter, the shade limbs in the summer, and the conversations of summer nights. But who I am from the path I have walked will live regardless if the path disappears.

i feel so natural

2010-12-11T18:17:00.000-05:00

This post will seem a little strange, odd, and quite honestly you might wonder why I am writing about the bathroom, but you must continue to read it in it's entirety to laugh. I was perusing the mall when I need a bathroom break (yes father, it was after the bookstore trip). So I walk into the well lit, automatic hand dryer, water turner oner, touch less soap dispenser, seat-covers provided, amply stocked toilet papered bathroom when I hear the voices of little girls. There are two little girls (maybe 8 and 5) in the handicap stall beside me discussing the bathroom task at hand.
Girl 1: come on Bre, I'll help you. Hold your dress up.
Girl 2: OK
Girl 1: eww Mom... we don't have time to get the seat cleaned... she has to go to bad.
Mom: it's okay, just help her hold her dress
Girl 1: But what about all the germies? Mom.. what about the germs?
Mom: It'll be okay, we'll wash later.
By now I'm thinking, they wouldn't never make it in a foreign country, camping, or a public school.
Girl 2: (this is the 5 year old and at this time is using the bathroom) Oh man... I feel so Natural. I feel so Natural.
Girl 1: Yeah...
Girl 2: Yeah I feel like Nature.

Okay... at this point I was shaking my head and just laughing. Natural? Really? Natural? You connect with nature not washing the toilet seat? Oh bless... I thought it was funny. So, I dare you to visit you next public restroom and say "I feel so natural...." (as you use the restroom)

12/4 always = Snow

2010-12-05T12:09:00.000-05:00

In North Carolina snow is something that happens usually in January, but this year we had a December snow. And that's something rare, but can be pinpointed to one date. December 4! Seriously. If we have an early snow in North Carolina, meaning snow in December, it will be on December 4th. And as crazy as that sounds, it's true. Now keep in mind, this snow will be followed by probably a week or weeks of 60 degree temps, but none-the-less it is snow. Yesterday I was at my parent's house when "HELLO SNOW!!" Big deal right? Nope. On December 4th for my entire life we have celebrated the birthday of Paw Paw and as you know... well.. you know why we don't celebrate anymore, I was really thinking about him yesterday.
So... making it short IT SNOWED!!! A real snow. Enough snow to build a snowman, look pretty, but not cause travel problems. A blanket of While Fluff covering the ground, making everything look new. I was outside gazing at the beauty when I thought, this really is God. He covers the muck, mire, messed up ground in our lives and makes it beautiful, makes it clean, makes it new. At the same time of gazing into the snow covered surroundings I had this overwhelming healing about Paw Paw not being there. Accepting this new chapter in my life, understanding the changes of what is. About living my life for the one who covers it all, and standing on the shoulders of who paved the way. So Paw Paw, I'm standing on your shoulders. You have paved the way for me and my family. The covering God has placed on our family was remembered yesterday in the snow, but like the covering placed over our sin once we're a part of God's Family! Thank You Snow!! Thank You Birthday SNOW!!!

Kenny who?

2010-11-29T21:59:00.000-05:00

There is a line in a Kenny Chesney song that states, "...about life and love and the lack of and the emptiness in my soul..." Well, I feel kind of sorry for that Chesney boy. You know, at times I think about life, love, but never the lack of and never an emptiness in my soul. My soul isn't determined by what is happening in my life (work or love). My Joy isn't determined by what happens to me, but what Christ is doing in me and through me. So, in all seasons give thanks. In all trials look to the one who will pull you out. IN EVERYTHING give thanks. God is so good. God is so great. But not to say that my mind doesn't ever drift at what might be, what could be, what may never be. In everything know the one who created you knows what's up. He knows how to work out your life. He knows who, what, when, where, and why things happen and don't happen. So Mr. Chesney, with all due respect, please fill your emptiness with Jesus. Not another song, not a temporary band aid of beer, but with the joy that will overflow to the world around you!!

times change

2010-11-26T20:55:00.002-05:00

This thanksgiving was a little strange. Don't get me wrong the family was there (almost all of them), the food was amazing, the fellowship was intense, and the laughs were plenty, but it was different. I started to see how we are all changing. How the values we were taught as a child are stronger than ever, and the importance of family has never been broken. I noticed it most in my cousin Matt. He is completing his first semester at ASU and being away has seemed to make him see how good his family is. I believe this rings true for us all. When we step out and see what others have compared to what we have, we notice how blessed we truly are. I was thankful to see his delight and excitement of being back home.

The strange thing about today was how silent it was. Everyone could feel the missing link. Everyone could feel the missing hand of the patriarch that has held us together for years, but no one was willing to state the obvious. It was weird. Not really sure what to think of it yet. Not really ready to accept the fact Paw Paw wasn't at the chamber, but was gone. I love thanksgiving. I love it the most of all the holidays. But I don't like the reminder of the one (my best friend, hero, biggest fan, i'll give you my kidney) not there. Christmas... I think I'll just away. I think I'll escape and start something new instead of living what was.

purt plus

2010-11-25T15:37:00.001-05:00

This is the season that I love but also puts me in a very reflective mode. For example: I examine my life currently compared to last year (work, relationships, joy, mistakes, successes, etc...), the possible outlook on the year to come, and what do I still want to cross off and add to my bucket list. But I will say that one of the main things that starts to hit me a little during this season is my very season of singleness. Before you think to much about that previous statement, keep reading. I love my life at this moment, I love the freedom I have, but at the same time I do wish to start sharing life. Sharing all the crazy things I do, experience, and see. There are times when I analyze the lives of my married friends and thank God for being single, but there are also times when I wish I was sharing this moment with someone other than me. So in this season of thanks I want to be thankful for the blessing of singleness, but when I see the bombardment of relationships around me it makes me wonder when my turn will come. It's as though the fact of being single is thrown in my face and beat in with a mallet. Gus says boys are stupid until they are 26. I think he's right. Daddy says I'm not dating or getting married until I'm 30. I think he's right too. Momma says one day I'll look at this season and wish it would return. I think she's right more than anyone.

music is the generation connection

2010-11-24T15:26:00.000-05:00

Dance Off Video from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

thanksgiving thanks

2010-11-19T06:39:00.000-05:00

I think its crazy to be thankful for a holiday about thanks, but then again I'm thankful to be thankful for this season of giving thanks! Every year we cram into my Aunt's basement to a spread of pot luck food on a pool table. We have conversations about what's been going on, how you been, EA football, old stories of the past, new ideas of what's to come, and laughing at Maw Maw with her cough and spray eating. Working in a school will make one realize all they have and all they should be thankful for. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday simply for the fact the focus is on gathering, family, food and football. Not presents, not hectic shopping, not trying to please everyone. It's more or less the calm before the storm... if you know what i mean. So, I pose the simple question... what are you thankful for? What do you have to not be thankful for? In everything give thanks. Working long hours, give thanks. Crazy kids, give thanks. Being in overload with family, work, projects, volunteering, extra responsibility, how am I going to pay that bill... give thanks.
As I am writing this blog... i am chomping at the bit to go home. I want to see my family so badly... and I'm thankful for that. Granted they're in a spitting distance (a long spit)... but I'm thankful for them.

what now?

2010-11-16T22:29:00.000-05:00

I'm a pretty patient person. I am forgiving. Think the best of people, but sometimes folks do me wrong. Sometimes I trust and believe. Sometimes I hold onto hopeful promises made. Sometimes I believe in things that may or may not be exactly true. Sometimes people disappoint me. And sometimes I have to face the facts of what is, is and what ain't, ain't. I think right now I have to hold out. I have to wait. Wait for age and time to change things. Wait for life to make since. But maybe not. Maybe now is the time to let go and realize once again it ain't me. It's ain't the country girl from Carolina. It ain't the teacher. It ain't the crazy runner who loves to do it all. But have no fear at some point in time there will be a time when it is me. I am the one that is ran after and desired. Maybe not today... but someday... and all those in the past who where thought to be the hoped for will be a faint image...

talking bout my generation

2010-11-14T12:27:00.000-05:00

This week in Health, I'm going to state the question to the students what folks are saying about our generation. Because I don't know about you but I hear a lot of bad stuff about the kids I teach. "this generation is lazy. these kids don't know what work is? these kids have no respect."
Well, I might be biting off more than I can chew God has really placed in my heart the desire and sun stand still prayer to rise of a generation of respect, honor, and value. I see so many kids not see value in their self, causing them to not value the work the do, or the way they behave. So, I stomp on the lies about my generation and the generation of the kids I teach. I see a generation of potential. A generation that is going to rise up and change the bible belt mind of "the rapture is coming there is no hope." HUSH! It only takes a few. It only takes some big prayers for value and against the attack of the enemy. Don't give up on my kids, pray for them. Don't condemn them for what they aren't, encourage them to utilize the potential with in. Speak truth of who they are, not who the world wants them to be! Does anyone get what I'm saying here? I'll let you know what they say. How they see themselves! I think we'll all be surprised!

oh... look, that's my favorite

2010-11-13T12:59:00.000-05:00

In Concord I believe we have just peaked our fall color beauty for this year. All the trees are starting to look less bright and more dark but that's not the point of this blog. I have had so many people ask me about the Beauty of Costa Rica. The Rain forest, the flowers, the insects, the sea line, etc... and yes all aspects of Costa Rica are beautiful, but nothing is as gorgeous as fall in Carolina.
The perfect temperatures of 40, in the morning, 70 in the afternoon, no humidity, and Carolina blue skies wisped with thin white clouds would make the lonely and depressed notice. But, I love the colors. When driving down the road between the tree lines of orange, red, yellow, brow, green, reddish/yellow, makes me soak in the beauty of my Father. This was no different last Thursday when I was traveling with my aunt. Here we are leaving her house for lunch, after planting 200 tulips, when we both say, "look at the trees!" It was crazy. Well, I continue the convo by stating how I love the Red leaves. How much I love seeing that one Red tree pop amongst the many Carolina Pines. Well, travel down the road 2 more miles amongst the tree barrier of Yellow and Orange I state, "Oh these... look!!... These are my favorite." As you can figure, there were no Reds in this bunch of trees, Red i do love, but hey Orange and Yellow I love too. Let's go a few more miles down the road and here we are staring at a tree where you can see the leaves color progress from green to red due to the sunlight exposure. It was amazing, and again I state... "look, that's my favorite."
After stating 3 different stages of leave changes as my favorite, my aunt karen pointed out the fact, I need to pick one, because you can only have ONE favorite... but Like a bunch! Well.... I decided to just change my statement to "oh... Look... I love leaves!"
I got to thinking more about my unable to pick a fav color of leaf delima and what the changing leaves showed... death. There is beauty in Death. There is beauty in every stage (color) of Death. Often times death get's a bad rap of darkness. And yes, when Paw Paw died, I was and continue to get sad. Death of the patriarch, friend, and hero is hard... but there is beauty in him passing as well (that'll be another blog) but for now, well, take a look around. Look around right now outside at the colorful tree line and tell me death is dark. Dying is dark. I don't know. It kind of looks as though when something is put to Death there is beauty. That awful secret you have put to death. That thought from the enemy you have put to death. The payment of your sins put to death. The actual death you were to face before Jesus, put to death. The one thing that you have battled with and finally won, put to death. It's beautiful. Put it to death!! and tell me which is your favorite...

Free WiFi

2010-11-02T14:15:00.000-04:00

Moe's has free WiFi. I love it but have realized that I feel very uncomfortable using free WiFi in the states. Somehow whipping out a computer, finding an outlet to plug it in (B/C of low battery) is embarrassing for me in the states, but the same idea/concept/action is not a big deal in Costa. How is that? I don't know. Any ideas? But... as I sat in Moe's I met this really cut burrito maker named Joe (Joe that works at Moe's). Well, Joe was very cute until I saw him walk outside with a cigarette in his mouth. What is it that makes someone instantly ugly because of a rolled stick of burning paper infused with cancer? I don't know... but homeboy Joe that works at Moe's just fell off the radar!
But... I will continue my Moe's Adventures... because I have coupons... and they have free internet!... that's what's up!

stateside

2010-11-01T20:07:00.000-04:00

Well, I've concluded I am the worst stateside blogger in the world. In an environment of everyday internet, and 24/7 power I can not write a single blog. But put me in a country with maybe once a week internet and hardly any power and I blog the ramblings of craziness.
This just goes to show how things change when one is back on the states. The hustle. The crazy. The race of being better... the race of making things better. The ideas of new things, the ideas of improving old things. You all know I teach school! I love it. But I want to share a secret with you all. I don't teach school because I think education is going to change the world; I teach school in efforts to impact a generation with the love of Jesus. Yes, education is power. Yes education is needed to make it in the U.S, but that's not my goal. My goal is my Sun Stand Still Prayer... "for the power of the spirit to flow through me, to empower a generation of honor, love and respect. For the overflow of the love of Jesus to cover each kid."
That's it. Simple! So, I ask for prayer. In a season of craziness that is quickly approaching, I am asking for prayer from you, for me to keep my vision. TO pray my Sun Stand Still prayer over me because I don't know about ya'll, but heck if I get distracted by "what I have to get done." or by that one class that's a real handful. I'm not the point. Jesus is the point. Be the change the world wants to see. So, yes I teach school. Yes, I teach in a public school. Yes I have friends that aren't "christians"(whoopty doo)... but how else will the dark know the light if no light goes into the dark?
I'll do better on this blog thing... I know ya'll missing my stories!!!! I'll have to tell ya'll about my new neighbors, family stories, and failed romance. Oh the life of Flossie... it's crazy I tell ya!

yep... it's been a month

2010-09-07T10:33:00.000-04:00

As you all school is back! The kids are filling my classroom, the noise of students in the hallways, the hustle of kids trying out for a sports team for the first time, and the joy of high school football. I love this time of year. I love the noises. I love the smells. I love the start of a "new year."

I live in a loft. Not a barn loft, but a simple room above a garage. I LOVE THIS PLACE!! It's in walking distance from my favorite restaurant. I burn 1/4 tank of gas a week for work. It's 3 miles from my gym. And it's cheap. The best thing, no crazy neighbors all around that I don't know. Granted I'm considered the city, but it's not apartment city!!! I have a yard and a garden spot!!! Don't forget fruit trees. OH boy. It's great!

God has really been putting some interesting people in my life the past month. Elevation has the vision, "so people far from God will be filled with life in Christ." Far meaning those who know about God, never heard about God, struggling with their relationship with God, etc... All people. So I have built relationships in the past few weeks with new people and strengthened existing relationships with others. One thing I have learned is people see God through you. They see God through the Love you show. It's not about what you get but what you give. And this extends beyond money. It is as simple as picking up sticks, scraping paint. or making it a point to say HEY!

It's crazy how life in the states is very predictable. Seriously, I don't really have any good stories. No interesting news. Thanks to scheduling, anti-bacterial, good roads and cars provide limited off the chart experiences.

in a whirlwind!

2010-08-23T11:43:00.000-04:00

Welcome back to Concord! So I arrived at my brand new loft apt last Sunday only to be put on a standstill by a Costa Rican illness, namely typhoid!! I know. I was so pumped about setting up the new place but all I was able to do was put my mattress on the floor, lay down and sleep for 5 hours. Then came the fever. Then came the awful stomach pains. Followed by the constant phrase rolling around in my brain stating, "get up heather... get up now... you have to unpack... get up heather.. you can do it." That didn't happen!
Monday my momma drove down to help me unpack and clean up the construction dust. Oh what a blessing she was!
Wednesday was back to work. It was pretty awful. I was still very lethargic, no appetite and stomach pains! It is nice to be back in the swing of school though! I love my job! How many teachers can say that? I really do love it. Getting to know the kids, building those relationships, tackling all the challenges that come with the school year! I love it!
Welcome back to karaoke! Oh how I've missed those CFR and Amici's people. So much fun.

More costa stories are on the way! I have pics!

1/4 of 100

2010-08-12T22:18:00.000-04:00

Yep! Another year. Another number. Another time to look back and see all that happens in a year. This year has been crazy. Some things the same while some different. Some good events and some bad events. Some unexpectedness, and some still unfolding! Some faces lost but some faces gained!
But what a great day!! Nothing beats a surprise party, clothes sale, family, out to eat, and strawberry cake!! I love my family! Happy Birthday to Me!!! And what makes it special are the people I share it with.
P.S. I'm getting old because I forgot to put my "HONK for HEATHER'S B-DAY" sign on the mail box. I mean... at least 5 years strong... people look for the sign like they look for the John Deere Tractor Christmas display! Maybe I'll put it up Saturday! hahahahah

You're So Vain that I'm Living on a Prayer but I will Survive

2010-08-11T11:58:00.002-04:00

All Spanish songs sound the same. If you don't believe me ask David, Erin, Jason, Sarah or Christine. They know due to the fact we all went Karaoke Singing two weeks ago. I must say as much as I love country music, Spanish Music is the equivalent of Hank, Conway and Mearl. All sound the same and none very good. Leave it to 3 Chicas to rock the Cart without an Ox. We all know karaoke isn't about being a good singer, it's about a good show. The crowd likes those who look silly, sound awful, or both. Think about it, who is most talked about in the American Idol Audition shows? The ones who are horrible!!
But... I think any time a gringa (who could confuse one for a tica... if it's dark) will bust out a classic song, that has more than likely been heard on the Radio while shopping in La Corona, do a little dance and get the crowd going... makes a good time!
Now.. can you figure out the three songs that were sung by three ladies? Just think if Diego came we would have had a Champion!

I'm Back!!

2010-08-10T14:57:00.000-04:00

How is it I posted more blogs out of the country than I have since I've been in the country with Internet at my fingertips? Oh wait, I know!! It's called welcome back to the land of GO.. GO.. GO.!!!!
Well, It's good to be back and I have many back blogs I need to type and will post this week from my last few days in Costa. They are pretty good... well I think they are!!;D But today I was thinking about different events happening in my life and had a revelation of who I am. Sometimes I have a hard time waiting on things to work out but they always do. For example: I have wanted to teach health since I graduated college, well guess who's the other Health Teacher at the Middle School?!! ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
God always proves faithful. Always. And so this entire new situation in my life isn't up to me!!! if you want something bad enough, go after it. If it fails, it fails! If it prospers, it prospers! So what is of importance in your life, that you go after? What has so much value that you make time for when there is no time?

Top 10... or 16!

2010-08-02T05:49:00.000-04:00

Why I want to Leave Costa

Family
Diet Sundrop
Truck
Dry Clothes
Elevation
Call Jugo
Is the oil still spilling?
2 dollar peanut butter (here a little jar is an easy 6 bucks!)
Karaoke at the Diner
Music coming out the radio in English
Cold Drink!
Daylight til 8
Refrigerator
Run on something flat
Silver Queen Corn
Talk to... well you know I just got sad because to finish that statement I was going to write Paw Paw but... i can't he.. won't be there.

Why I DON'T want to leave Costa!

Limited Power
Always Outside (for real.. even inside is outside because of no walls!)
Simpler life
Ride the 4-wheeler on the main road
Jason, Sarah, Fanny, Diego, Emily, Luka, Heather, Bart
No News is Good News (I have no idea what's happening in the world)
Hard run on crazy mountain road with Fanny
Sunrise at 5
Pineapple, Mango, Bananas
Speaking Spanish
Tico Schedule (2hr work, breakfast, 2hr work, lunch, 2hr work, coffee, 2hr work, supper)
Tiki Mono as an alarm clock
The view from where I'm sitting
Many dirt roads
Boys at La Co
Bavaria
Broom/Mop Combo

As you can tell... they kind of contradict each other...
:D

Houston

2010-08-01T05:40:00.006-04:00

Hiatus over! The Houston Group is here and you know what that means!?! Back to chopping, sauteing, baking, cutting, mixing, massive amount of food buying and enjoying every minute. My last week! Can you believe it? One week left. Sad.. a little. Happy... a little. Excited... a lot! I love going home seeing my family, having fewer bugs, driving the YOTA, but going home also means everything hits the fan. 10 days to move my things from the parents, back to the new APT, get work set up (new room and curriculum), all paperwork set, visit with all the family, possibly go south, wedding party, so long party, and OH WAIT... my birthday is then too. Happy 25 to me. (I need a new Timex watch... my was stolen!) Why am I going back? You just read what is about to come! Good Question Heather!
Answer: Daily Double!
That's where the people you love are. Where you make the money to come to Costa each summer and where God wants you at this point in time.
Ya'll get pumped. My face is back in a week!

well... it rained!

2010-07-31T17:37:00.000-04:00

If you have previously read my blog you will know the mountain road has needed rain. Hard Rain. Clean the car without a rag rain. Well... it has rained. In it's wake has left the road clean of mud and exposed to underlying rock. Except for the HUGE landslide blocking the entrance! Yep. You read correctly. We have had mini landslides in the past that were easily cleared by a few work hands and myself, but this one even John Henry couldn't pic or shovel and opt for a machine. (if you're completely lost with the John Henry comparison... holy moly... google Johnny Cash).
As Erin says, "We have a snow day!" We couldn't leave in the car. No Power. Little Food. No gas for the generator to work, and can only ride the 4-wheeler! It's a snow day, minus the snow! What should one do on a day like this? Run to Uvita... of course. So, a nice run remembering my lessons from the first one and adding an additional lesson. Costa Rican gaurdrails are made out of fallen trees due to mudslides! Needless to say I had fun on my snowless snowday!
P.S. Diego came and picked me up on the 4-wheeler. Didn't want to run back the 7plus miles!

Lessons Learned Running from Refugio to Cafe Perica

2010-07-27T14:26:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I decided to run from the mountain to Cafe Perica. Maybe about 11 or 12km... but it was the BEST run i have had in a while! So while I was running I thought of different things I learned while on this nice trek!
1. 4 big dogs live on San Josito Road
2. The whales tale was created to be seen at 9am
3. It's okay to look like Shaggy when running downhill.
4. I now understand how bending knees is crucial on all downhill running
5. Run TO Uvita not FROM Uvita
6. Be ready to jump into a ditch at anytime
7. Pedestrians DO NOT have the right of way
8. The Coastal Road with Cars is more dangerous than the Jungle Road with snakes
9. Running facing traffic is a new concept for Ticos
10. Horn blowing from friends while running through downtown Hillsborough in high school prepared me for running in Costa
11. The road from San Josito to the Servicentro Bahia is a slight uphill... who knew??
12. When going down a dirt road and you think, "I don't remember these pot holes," turn around
13. When going down the same road with the new pot holes and wonder where's the butterfly colony?? turn around.
14. When you finally realize the road you are on will not go to the ocean don't beat yourself up with how you should have turned around at the pot holes.
15. My current shoes are shot!
16. Iguanas crossing the road is okay... cats are rare
17. School kids have P.E. class and Music Class in the same room
18. Lastly, Cafe Perica opens at 1pm on Monday, so be prepared to walk an additional 2kms back to Uvita to get a ride.

Catarata

2010-07-26T20:40:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time on a mountain in Costa Rica lived a tico family of 3. Their names were Diego, Fanny and Emily. In the summer months many gringos would stay on the mountain for weeks at a time. Also in the summer months 3 chicas lived and worked on the mountain with the tico family because of all the gringos. Well, one Saturday, there were no gringos so the tico family and the 3 chicas decided to go to a BIG (at least 150 meter) waterfall. So they loaded up in the jimmy and 4-wheeler because it's 30 minutes to drive instead of 8 hours to walk... through the Jungle! Driving over the GAS light in the Jimmy came on, saying there was low gas, and since Heather was driving she knew NO A/C and neutral helped save the precious fuel. SHE also thought... OH CRAP!
The group arrived at the waterfall only to climb through the jungle to reach the base where they were all amazed at how big and strong the water was falling :)! Many pictures were taken and convos about Planet Earth were conversed before the muddy trek back through the jungle to the spot where the car rested.
When they tico family and 3 chicas got back to the car, they all waded in the creek running close by. They washed their muddy shoes while Diego and Heather climbed over large bolders to stand below a small, yet powerful waterfall for fun. They both agreed it was as a good back and neck massage.
As they time came to an end there was still a gas problem (not with stomachs.. with cars). Deep in the jungle, no gas stations can be found. Diego decided to siphon one gallon of gas from the 4-wheeler to the car. One gallon later, back on the dirt jungle path to Refugio. A lot of Neutral and no A/C provided enough gas back. There were a lot of laughs and pictures but the entire group agreed that waterfall was the most incredible waterfall they had ever seen.

The END!

BORING!!! I KNOW.. doesn't even sound like me... but please imagine a picture book for little kids! HAHAHAHA

A Rare Moment

2010-07-25T13:04:00.000-04:00

There have only been a few times in my life when I didn't know what to say or couldn't write down what I wanted to say. For example: college graduation day looking at my momma and seeing a little tear, the logic in moving to Concord, first day of Kindergarten, standing over the casket of my best friend, and a week ago when I said so long to a boy I have only known this summer. For an entire week I attmeped to write some form of so long letter, but each attmpt was a failure. The letter either sounded like a country song, could be a country song, rambled, or had so many scratched out sentences it looked like the art work of a 2 year old. I even wrote a letter about how I couldn't write a letter (now that is lame!).
I think deep down I didn't want to write a good bye letter because I didn't want this person to leave. I didn't want to accept the fact of not knowing when or if we'd ever meet again. Time and distance has a crazy effect on people. SO... with a big hug, (complete avoidance of eye contact), and a kiss on the cheek, I said, "see you in the states." Yep... What was that!?!? I don't know.
Because as soon as the words were released from my mouth my brain realeased a.. "we'll see about that." Ya'll all know these kinds of good byes. The ones on high school graduation when you say, "Oh, I'll come visit you on break," only to be followed by 5 years of never staying in contact until you "run into" each other at a high school reunion. You know? You bound to know!
Anyway, I had an anti-climatic departure of a good friend whom I have come to enjoy being around this entire summer. No real plan of what is next, only contact info scribbled on a piece of scrap notebook paper, placed in his shirt pocket as he walked away. Why contact info? Because that's the only dang thing I could think to write! And, who mails letters anymore? (well, i do actually. It's important to support the US Mail.)
Ironically enough, in my reflection of what I should have said, country song lyrics (old and new), combined with jumbled thoughts return!

Diego... tengo un problema!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-07-23T13:04:00.000-04:00

Below you will find a picture of the vehicle I am about to write about.
FJ PICTURE
I feel like I'm in Big John (our Christmas Tractor) when I was driving it up the mountain yesterday. Here's the story... The FJ was stuck at the bottom of the mountain and needed a driver to get it back up. Diego (the hardest working, smartest, can fix anything, reminds me of my daddy) tico asked me to ride down and drive it back up the mountain for him. Honestly, I really didn't want to because one the FJ is like driving a tractor and two the road is still awful, regardless of the fact Diego, Humberto, and I worked on it all day (that's how I relax on my vacation... work! can't help it.. it's in my blood)! BUT... I start driving the mountain in this big ole FJ and do great until I get to the last "S" curve. I start up the S, with Diego following me in the Red FJ, when I start to spin. Well Dag... It wasn't that bad of a spin but I wasn't going anywhere. With my foot pressing the clutch, one hand on the wheel, one on the stick shift, and the other foot on the break I stick my head out the window and yell, "DIEGO, yo tengo un problema (Deigo, i have a problem)." Luckily we were close to a flat spot in the mtn road, so Diego hopped out and came running to where I was. He said I needed to back up and get more speed. So I backed (slowly because on this incline breaks are not really good... it's the equivalent of breaking on ice) to the flat spot and get another running start.
Well... the good news is I got past the part I was stuck the first time... the bad news is I got stuck further up.. in the middle of the "s". Here I am, not moving, spinning on mud (because we need strong rain), sandwiched between two mountain dirt walls, two ditches, and knowing I was going to have to back this thing around a curve, down a mountain, and to the flat spot. Again...with my foot pressing the clutch, one hand on the wheel, one on the stick shift, and the other foot on the break I stick my head out the window and yell, "DIEGO, yo tengo un problema!!!!!!!!" with a little more volume. I was starting the freak out.. just a little. Here comes Diego running up the mountain to save the day. I coach myself by taking a deep breath, putting this small tractor like vehicle in reverse, and pray to God.. in English and Spanish! Foot off the clutch a little, on the break a little and... HELLO slide. An out of my control, holy moly I'm picking up speed, going sideways, I'm going to hit the wall like a nascar driver... slide. Diego is telling me which way to turn the wheel but my Spanish translation wasn't working at the moment, so... I had NO IDEA what he was saying! I stop sliding only to be sideways in the road. That's a fine position to be in, if sideways wasn't between two big mountain walls and on an incline that could result in a rollover at any moment. So I sit sideways. What do I do? Well, a 3 point turn wasn't going to work. So I start to go in reverse (thank you diesel engine and power) and move a little.. and slide more but the slide was good. I started to turn in the direction where I could actually get down the mountain in a forwards motion. The entire time Diego is on some side of the FJ providing some support to keep me from turning over! Well... I made it back to the flat spot and told Diego I was walking back to Refugio! He chuckled and told me to get in the Red FJ and he thought there was a leak in one of the seals causing the Green FJ to lose power!.. well that's good to know.. thanks for telling me now that I have almost peed in my bricthes!
Christine and Erin (the other interns) have been going to different places all week, going on "adventures". Well, no offense to these girls but going to shops and looking at the waterfalls isn't very adventurous to me.... come talk to me when you're sideways in an "S" curve... that's adventure!

Chalk vs Canned Corn... I pick canned

2010-07-22T20:57:00.000-04:00

On day 2 of my brief hiatus, I was able to go to La Corona (no it's not a beer sore, it's the name of their grocery store... well, actually it could be the beer store too because that's where most buy beer!) and leisurely shop the isle due to only needing to cook fore me! That's a break in itself!

On a side road here, the staff at La Corona looked at me today in amazement of how LITTLE food was in my hand basket, and I was continually asked, "why so little food?" and told, "No big cart today!" A complete flip flop from the entire summer. I told Brian (my favorite) I was getting fat and needed to cut back :D

Anyway back to the main road, I was in the produce section when I saw corn! A nice ear of fresh picked, right from some garden, still in the husk, take me home Heather Lasley because you know you're missing the silver queen being grown and harvested right now at the Lasley Plantation, white corn! (excuse the run on sentence... I teach math!) Needless to say I was pumped.
SO, last night, I shucked, inspected for bugs, washed and put in a pot of boiling water my nice ear of corn. 15 minutes later, sitting on a plate, smeared with a lil butter I take a bite... followed by an immediate spit out. CHALK! That's what it tasted like. CHALK! Flavorless, dry, in you mouth awful aftertaste, nasty hint of butter flavor, I could use this on a sidewalk, CHALK! To say I was disappointed would be an understatement.

I was already tasting the sweet, succulent juice that only tiny kernels from July Silver Queen Corn can produce but instead I bit into a nice ear of: What the crap?, are you serious?, you can't even make moonshine out of this so called Costa Rican Corn. The moral of the story is: Don't drink the water in Mexico and Don't eat the corn in Costa Rica!

Pensacola Team

2010-07-22T08:41:00.010-04:00

The largest team of the summer, or ever to stay on the mountain, came from Pensacola, Florida. Of all the teams to have the massive amount of people, this team was the best. Their spirit, attitude and personalities made the consistent 3 meals a day for 38 people (because staff and interns increase the numbers) enjoyable and easy. Don't read this incorrectly, I'm beat. We worked hard during their stay at Refugio and even harder in preparation of their arrival. A group this large requires 26 beds. Meaning in one day:

26 sets of sheets put on 26 beds, accompanied with: a large towel, hand towel, wash cloth, pillow and blanket.
Four mattresses placed in a weight room for teenage boys, an extra mattress in the bunk room and one in the corner room suite.
A complete overhaul of one room (the day before they arrived) including paint, all furniture, thorough cleaning of windows, frames, bathroom, porch, etc... and then set up for a guest.
Scavenging for lighters (thanks GOP boys for using them up!) to go in each room
3 rooms needed to be cleaned and made guest appropriate due to the fact the previous group left the same day the Penn group arrived.

I wish I would have photo copied the to-do list I made. It was insane! But a huge shout out goes to J.Wax for getting the hairball out of the drain. Y'all know I'm pretty tough with an iron stomach due to 10 cups of black coffee a day, but a hairball full of someone elses hair will shut me down like the gulfs current fishing industry.
Then, the food shopping for such a large group of people. Again, the Ticos look at me with thoughts of, "where does this girl put all this food?" Remember there isn't a Walmart, we do not have a frig and some days the store has the item and some days it doesn't. You will be happy to read each meal resulted in full bellies, happy people and at least an hour of dirty dishes to wash, dry and put away only to repeat the cycle a few hours later.
Now most regular people may think this is crazy, but not me. I love this kind of work. I love the hectic, chaotic, craziness accompanied with this task. My body functions better the busier it is! I feel more energized and alive on days I work as hard as my daddy. Minus the fact of losing J.Wax to the states, this past week was the hardest and funnest week in Costa so far!
All to conclude, the Pensacola team was AMAZING! The dentist (aka Mr. Kirkpatrick's Twin), Mintons, Floyds, Shells, Strange, Carrie and the others will be missed. So, as you can imagine I need a break. Bring on the 9 days of not having a team! Hello Vacation in Costa Rica! Only to be greeted with one more team and a return to the states. So how long do you think I'll chill on a vacation? Not long. Re-read what's about this paragraph... I like to stay busy. The team left yesterday and I have managed to shovel massive amounts of dirt out of the road this morning but, I am able to come to town and blog more!

Pray for RAIN!!!

2010-07-21T12:41:00.000-04:00

Of all the years I have been in Costa Rica for the summer months, I have never seen the mountain road in this poor of shape. The mountain road has always been tough and one needs a 4x4 Low vehicle to maneuver up and down, but 4x4 low isn't good on a 12 gauge roof incline in 6-8 inches of clay/silt mud. I need your help. Pray for Rain! I'm sure you are thinking, "well heather, you are in the rain forest, doesn't it rain all the time?" Well, yes and now. The kind of rain we need in the Hurricane Floyd, 3 inches/hour, hotsie powered, take the pain off your barn, 24 hour downpour God can do it, I know! The same way he shot fire from heaven, fed the Israelites manna and made the sun stand still for Joshua. So, I as you to pray audaciously and specific for the mountain road. Lluvia is the Spanish word for rain! So ask in both languages. Thanks! Gracias!

Just Like in the States

2010-07-20T13:49:00.001-04:00

All fix-a-flat places have the same smell, type of mechanics, and female receptionist. The smell is oil rubber mixed with a slight hint of exhaust; the office/waiting area is freezing cold furnished with 2 couches, a drink machine, and a table of free, old, cold coffee from the A.M brew; Car magazines and one kid's book sloppily cover a table providing reading material for the lucky folks waiting; and the same female receptionist trying to run the joint as cleanly as possible in a male/oil/grease dominated environment. But all this detail is fascinating to me because it provided a sense of familiarity, a brief moment of feeling as though I was in the states! So this past week when I was waiting for the tire to be fixed (OH and if you have a monterro know their tires are "go flat prone" on mountain roads because this makes number 2 in 2 weeks) I was taken to the states, waiting inside any mechanics waiting area, wishing I had a jacket!

A Come to Jesus Meeting!

2010-07-10T20:28:00.000-04:00

This week has been quite an interesting week. GOP boys left. It was sad yet at the same time I have been encouraged to see the transformation in their lives while they were on the mountain. The life restored in their eyes. The joy returned. The knowledge of the power they each have to fight the enemy when he comes attacking! So, we had our largest group of the summer (so far) come, love us and leave only to be followed by the smallest group. Right now on the mountain we have a family of 5. Really kind of cool to think about to be quite honest. I have imagined what it would be like to have my family on the mountain for weekend. Then to think about my ENTIRE... maw maw, aunts, uncles, cousins... everyone on the mountain for a weekend, and I started to laugh. I could hear maw maw saying how cold she was and having me explain every single ant, animal, and sound 500 times. I could hear my momma telling me all the food borne illnesses I am being exposed to and the fact we don't have hot water all the time. My daddy would be inventing something or fixing the FJ from breaking down all the time. Kevin would probably go stir crazy. Abbie would yell at every single bug she saw on the wall only to be followed by "whoa, that's cool." Matt would go hum. Thomas and Jacob wouldn't know what to do without their cell phones because that means no girlfriend communication. Brenda would be like me, sit up in the hammock and read a book. Wesley, would want to redecorate/ paint something. Aunt Sylvia would be in absolute amazement, and want to know every detail about the place as well as give wonderful ideas on how to make it better! Allison and Daniel would be harvesting the beans, coffee, or trying to figure out where to put some animals to keep the grass down. The more I thought about my family on the mountain, the more I wanted to see it happen. I think it's be an adventure. Costa Rica wouldn't know what hit him. You think California was in shock of Jed Clampet, Costa Rica wouldn't know the Spanish words to explain the Lasleys.

The pace this week slowed down with the decrease in the number of people around. Still chopping away at the veggies. Still in love with cooking beans and rice!

I had a come to Jesus meeting today! Those those who don't know, in my past I have battled and have experienced freedom from several eating disorders. I know. What? Heather Lasley? Yep folks, I'm not perfect. Shocker!! The enemy is a sneak. He knows when to attack. He knows to kick us when we're down. I know his plan and how he works because as a coach you study the other team. You know where the weakest link is, what the player's tendencies are and you devise a strategy to attack the weakness. So think of Satan as the coach, studying us, knowing where and when we are weak. So, off and on in the past 6 months I have struggled. It all started with the death of Paw Paw. One week of upset, grieving, I can't eat I'm so depressed stomach, manifested thoughts of old habits and patterns. For the past 3 weeks my entire eating schedule has been off. I know personally, one of the ways I (big I) kept control (not giving it all up) was to follow a strict food schedule. If the schedule got messed up or if I ever felt full, my stomach would almost out of habit reject my food. Possibly to years of abuse. But NO MORE!!! The past 3 weeks I have had to follow a "meal" schedule. Meaning eat at meals. Meaning feeling full. Meaning hello barf. Resulting in old tendencies, giving power to the enemy, shame, and beating myself up for detouring back to this awful road. Here comes the good part...

This morning I was basking in the morning sun of Costa Rica, trying to get my sun tan back (because kitchen duty and rain has taken my color) I sat and listened to God. So I'm on the upper deck and cry out to to God, "WHAT IS UP? Lord, why? Why again? You freed me from this 2 years ago, why am I returning to this?" It was as though the Lord said, "You never completely gave it all up. You have a feeding schedule. YOU still control it." And you know what.... shocker here, God was right. So I began to pray in audacious faith. Asking the Lord to take this from me. Take it all. To heal my mind. To heal my body. The same way he fixed my hormones when they were out of whack. The same way he healed the bleeding woman in the Bible. To just take it all. To give me strength to fight and to fight Satan for me. Then I roll over and look at the huge cross looking over the jungle out towards to sea and I remember. JESUS died for this. He knew that I would need him to take this sin. To take this battle. He died for Heather Lasley. He died to kick Satan in the mouth so the enemy would have no power of me. And the very fact I have been allowing this to happen has been like a slap in Jesus' face. It was as though I have been saying, "Yeah Jesus you died for this sin, but I'm going to hold on to it, so you're death was pointless. They beat you to shreds so I could stay in bondage under the influence of the enemy."
So at that moment I got mad. I got mad at the enemy. I started to proclaim truth over WHO my God is. Over what he has done for me and how Satan has no authority or dominion over my life. This proclamation was followed by another prayer of strength and a plead for a sign. I roll back over on my back, keep in mind I'm still on a concrete slab of the upper deck trying to catch some rays, when I see not one but at least 10 kite-tailed, eagle type birds; the scripture from Isaiah 40: 28-31 came into my mind,
"He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall MOUNT UP WITH THE WINGS LIKE EAGLES; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

The enemy has lost! The scripture also says, "resist the enemy and he will flee." Eventually, he will get tired of coming after me because I refuse to let him win. Praise God for the cross and the freedom we have in HIM!!

Dance Dance Revolution!

2010-07-05T19:43:00.002-04:00

Life at Refugio this summer has been amazing and I have come to appreciate, the invention of electricity all day, veggie choppers, and ice cold drinks... again. It doesn't matter how many times I come here, once I return to the states I get spoiled to these modern appliances and conveniences. Honestly, I'm not quite sure how many more times I can knick my thumb with a knife without eventually cutting the entire thing off.

Last week was fun. We were feeding the boys GOP and worked all day to feed 15 people for each meal. It's been fun! Know in Costa everything, well most everything, has to be purchased on a day by day basis, which means going to the store everyday, and having the ticos look at you like, "how in the heck are these 3 skinny girls eating all this food?"

Let the chopping keep on chopping! Preparing supper!

Thursday night was spontaneous dance party night. It took me back to some old days of Dance Party Craziness, but I'm sorry to say, hands down the best time washing dishes I have ever had! David put on Devil Went Down to Georgia and that means I should cut a rug! So I take off in a crazy, clogging, river/line dancing, insane FUN! So, I started tearing up the place, then Justin got in on it, and then everybody else figured, heck I know I don't look as stupid as they do, why not have some fun to? So washing dishes, drying dishes, sweeping/mopping the floor has never been so much fun! I loved it!!

Luke and Me doing a lil criss cross action!

Just so you know, He doesn't smoke but ALL of the GOP boys do, so he was making a point of how silly they look and just trying to be funny.

Dance Break! Me and Justin taking a lil chill, because you know we got the party started!

Last Friday Morning J. Wax, 3 GOP boys, and myself went on a zip line canopy tour of the rain forest! Amazing the first 5 or 6 lines, and then after that it was more mundane than fun. Don't get me wrong being suspended in the air 900 something feet is pretty fun... but after a while, it does get a little old. Friday was fun too. I went out after supper, had a nice walk on the Costa Rica Beach at night, and chilled for a little after my afternoon in the kitchen.

Saturday was the day chaos. A new team from Roanoke came which means more mouths to feed, 27 to be exact. Bigger pots, more food, and much more coffee (and we're talking cowboy coffee of boiling water and pouring over the grounds!) More people, also means getting the rooms ready for the people to sleep and be comfortable while they are here. Erin and I cleaned all day. I mean scrubbed.. scrubbed.. because apparently teenage boys are very dirty and the boys bunk room was absolutely disgusting. It was insane!! Then the day was capped with a night of cooking for the massive amount. We were dead tired but thought.. it is okay, we'll have tomorrow off to chill because the hired cooks will be here. Well, wrong again. The cooks had an emergency, which meant CRAZY SUNDAY. Know I was not about to let that ruin my plans for Saturday Night fun!

So, the Fuller's kids, Christine, and myself went off for a drink and karaoke. All was fun until on the way back up the mountain we had a flat tire. Great! It's midnight, in the middle of the jungle, with a flat tire. In my brain I thought that's okay we'll just change it, I've had years of practice with the insane amount of Flat Tires I have had in my life. Let me just say... Boys please be boys!! Jake and Cameron complained about the flat and didn't at all want to help, while Josh and I tried to jack the car up and fix the tire. Know I am all about being independent, but come on now. I know for a fact of one boy who if were in the car would have been the first to change the tire, but this boy is on an Island... but anyway back to the story. The jack sucked. Plan 2. Walk the one mile trek up the mountain to the center, get another jack, take the four wheeler to the vehicle and change the tire. So, Jake, Cameron and myself take off. Praise the Lord I run/walk this thing everyday, but not in flip flops and not at night. Also thanks to the amazing Flashlight my Daddy bought me I was able to light up the dense forest of the jungle and keep an eye open for jungle book animals! Get back to the center around 1am, Jake gets on the four wheeler to take them the other jack and I go to bed! Not really, because I was keyed up from the walk. 15 minutes later, all 3 people come back on the four wheeler because they decide to change the tire in the morning. Oh boy. I should have went. Thank God I'm a country girl because I know how to change a tire... but on this particular night I knew I should sleep for Sunday because it was 2 and I needed to be up at 5! Sunday was all day in the kitchen, but the food was amazing, the new team loves us, and I can say I was beat like a dirty rug...but Sunday came and went... all with 3 hours of sleep!

Needless to say today I was glad to have a day off. Why Monday? Because the Roanoke team is gone to an Indian Village for today and tomorrow, and the GOP Boys are on an Island with Jason and J. Wax, meaning no cooking until Tuesday Night.

Below are some fun pictures from our time in Uvita. We work hard everyday but do try to get off the mountain (because we do work and live there) on the weekends to go to the local soccer game, beach, jason y sara's house or town. I will say I have come to appreciate all my momma does because it is hard work preparing, cooking, and taking care of people everyday but I wouldn't change it for ANYTHING!!

3 Interns that run the kitchen at the soccer game

More Soccer FUN!

Week One

2010-06-28T20:42:00.000-04:00

Needless to say I love this place. I can't give a good explanation as to why, but it's crazy to think that when I arrive in this country, or get close to Uvita I suddenly feel like I'm coming home. It's the same feeling I get when I reach exit 154 at home. But here's the low down for the week.

Internet Cafe is up and running. It's a really cool place for the kids and members of the community to come get on the internet, play xbox, and now we are watching nonstop soccer. God is really using the common place int he Balina community to reach people. Just so you know, I can really see myself living above this cafe one day!! I have some many God sent ideas, but honestly I don't want to embark on this adventure on my own. I want to share it with someone which is crazy for me. You all know I am a very independent, fly by my seat kind of person, but for some reason I feel as though I want someone to share my living above the cafe life. If you know what I mean?

The mountain is the mountain. God's special place. It is holy ground and all who come leave stronger, more powerful, and deeper in love with Christ. I have had the pleasure to watch the Lord work in my friend Erin's life and see the revelation of the simplicity of Christ's love for us. I have also enjoyed spending my day's in the kitchen with two other wonderful women cooking, cleaning, and providing the needs for all on the mountain.

The bugs are still here. How could they not? I believe the fact that here there is no use of pesticides and most all stuff grown is grown without chemicals, the bugs stick around. Which is good. Don't you ever wonder where all the bugs are in the states? I think we've killed them. Which means we need more chemicals for pollination, and I don believe all these chemicals are contributing to the massive amount of cancer we face in the states.

I've rejoined some of my old friends while I've been here. Fannie, Diego, and Emily (my Costa Family) all live and work on the mountain. As well, as the Fullers, and other people who have passed by in the summers past. The same girl that works at Don Israel (the supermarket) still works at that supermarket and Diego's Dad is still the only person I know that is 70 years old and still works like a 20 year old man! But this summer has been different. I have met some new people. For example... Esteven. Not Steven.. but Esteven. He is Diego's nephew who helps at the cafe. He is great. He is so nice and he loves learning English!
Another new person is the Cafe' Intern J. Wax. He is a Louisiana boy. I have never met anyone in my life who I have so much in common with. He boy is a teacher, coach, raised on a farm, and knows the same country songs. We get along really good! I told him it's nice to have someone down here that sounds like me (tribute to Jay Key.. all you NWMS folks). We have had such a similar background and upraising that it is crazy!! I think you will here more about him in the future!... maybe.

If I haven't said it before I'll say it now. Every summer in Costa is a different experience. Every summer in Costa God reveals new exciting things about me, about his love, and about the next part of the road he has for me. It's fun. It's exciting, and I can't wait to share with you the adventure he is going to unfold.

Oh.. Pics to come soon... it's hard to upload here!

In Costa

2010-06-22T14:34:00.000-04:00

I made it!.. again. I really do love this place, the people, the climate. I love it all. It is going to be a good summer once we start cranking. There is currently no electricity on the mountain because the generator isn't working correctly.. but that will be fixed soon. I have already met many new people but have also connected with a lot of familiar faces.

We are about to get full swing into the teams coming up on the mountain which is exciting yet at the same time a little stressful. Making sure we have enough food for the people and not blow up the mountain with all the propane appliances!

I will say it has been the biggest blessing to watch God move in Erin in the small amount of time I have been here. She has been stretched and stretched outside of her comfort zone and I am so proud of her! We have a full summer ahead so be ready for more posts in the future.

As for now... We met with Sarah and got the low down for the summer planning. We also got the jist of all our duties. It is going to be fun. It's going to be hard. It's going to be AMAZING. I think this summer is going to fly by and all be writing my final post of where has it gone!

Here we Go!

2010-06-18T23:21:00.000-04:00

It starts. Away in the jungle again for 7 weeks. I feel different this time around. For a gut reason I believe this will be my last summer in Costa. Me Encanto Costa Rica but this year is different. The mission is different. We will be hosting teams of missionaries. It is going to be work but fun. All the new people. All the new lives changed. All the new testimonies that will arise from the time spent on the mountain! The vision over the mountain was stick figures arriving and stronger figures leaving. Which is amazing to watch. Not only personally but in the lives of all who experience the presence of God on this holy ground! So folks, please pray for safety, good health, and openness to the revelation of plans the Lord has while I am there and when I leave! So.. here we go!

Just SMILE!

2010-06-09T12:24:00.000-04:00

I think we all need a day to be silly and well... not care if we pick our nose!

teaching extras

2010-06-08T15:04:00.000-04:00

Being a teacher is more than just knowing the information to teach kids; it also includes seeing the potential and empowering each kid. And it's crazy, but this intense training kind of flows over in other areas of my life. I meet new people, get to know them and see the potential they could have to change their world if they just let it happen. Or I believe in someones ability to do something when they don't believe in themselves. For example in a student I can pick out the leaders, the athletes, the ones that will eventually get into trouble, or the ones that are just trying to survive the home they are in. With people I see folks that have been battered, feel stuck, or just wasting their life on things that won't matter in the long run.
So maybe this teacher instinct/training isn't a learned thing but a gift from God. He has gifted me with the ability to see the good in people, pray for them, and use me to in someway to influence them (for the good :p). I have met a lot of interesting people in the past few months and I feel God has placed each of them in my life for this reason. I can't change people. I can't fix people. I can't even make them listen to how great I think they are but wasting their time on things of no value. But I can PRAY. And prayer is what changes people. God changes people so I ask you to pray for me so I know how to pray for others!

year end ties

2010-06-05T10:21:00.000-04:00

So the end of the school year is near. 3.5 days to be exact. Unreal how quickly the time goes looking back but never noticed while living through it! So as this season comes to an end a new season begins again. It almost feels as though I should set some kind of new year resolution but I don't really know what that would be. But my prayer is for complete guidance in all I do. I know I mess up. I know I'm not perfect but the power I have in prayer is unstoppable. Big decisions are on the horizon and I ask you help me pray for guidance and strength to carry out God's will in them all! Sometimes my flesh gets in the way of what I know God is asking me to do. But my spirit is strong in the Lord!

Oh Race Week

2010-05-24T22:47:00.000-04:00

If you don't know.. you should know that it is Race week... which means stay away from Concord, NC. So with that being said, you should also know that people start camping out around the race track 3 weeks prior to the actual 600 mile race that will occur next Sunday. But this is all background information to what I am about to share. If I only had a camera when I drove by.. but here comes the description.
Old 1990 something school bus... painted red and orange and yellow... has an awning off to the side... the entire bus on jacks... and being used as a camper.. Yes that's right.. People have this sucker up on jacks.. and living in it as a camper. I will say it's inventive, original, cheap, and a great way to make a travel home...BUT.... there are to many windows for my taste. I need a picture. If I can get one i'll post it. SO Daddy, don't get any ideas because I know your brain is already turning. Thank you Lord for letting me see this bus today! You knew I needed to laugh

Silence

2010-05-20T15:56:00.000-04:00

I am so confused and scattered right now I have nothing to say. I can't even formulate a complete thought... just silent.

Put Together

2010-05-11T14:21:00.000-04:00

God did not THROW you together at the last minute. He PUT you together. He crafted every detail. He planned every part. Every part of you is for a purpose. We need to change the cultural mindset. We are put together from the inside out, Not the outside in. God PUT me together and did one heck of a job!!

Ode to Momma

2010-05-07T10:00:00.000-04:00

As the day approaches I would like to take a moment and tell about my momma. ~~Momma's are special people. They do it all. Think about it.~~ Okay... as you can tell this is a hard blog. I really don't know where to begin. Moms do it all. NO offense to my daddy (whom i love just as much).. but moms are hard to write about. I can't just narrow down a few stories. I can't just mention one thing without a bazillion other memories coming to mind. I mean honest. Momma came to EVERY sporting event i was involved in. The ones I coached (when i was in town) included. She wasn't the loudest in the stand. She didn't get crazy.. but she was there! Momma watched me go through a hard time in my life and let me go through it. She listens to me babble on about the relationship issues in my life. She gives advice from wisdom gained over the years. She is always proud of me. No matter what. No matter when. No matter the situation. She PRAYs for me!! Which is the biggest and most vital thing any mother could do I give her credit for my laugh and my ability to not say NO to every time I can help someone. Here's to you momma! Thanks for doing it all. Loving sacrificially. And teaching me how to be a woman of God (which by the way is a continual work in progress).

Happy Mother's Day!

Where Are They Now?, Part 4: When God Crossed His Arms (Guest Speaker: Pastor Judah Smith)

2010-05-03T22:26:00.000-04:00

Where Are They Now?, Part 4: When God Crossed His Arms (Guest Speaker: Pastor Judah Smith)

HEY... okay when you have time watch the entire sermon... but if not skip to minute 16 and watch to about 20... and then watch 25-30... until you have time to take in the entire sermon!... it's a good one

I had a dream...

2010-05-02T22:05:00.000-04:00

This is not a tribute to MLK but a for real dream I had. As most know paw paw died 4 months ago and i'm sure you all (if anyone reads this thing besides renn) are tired or reading about him but he's still heavy on my heart. Not a day goes by with out a song, picture, phrase, or memory of him popping in my mind but last Monday Night was the first time Paw Paw was in one of my dreams. Which is kind of erie because it was 4 months from the day of his death. So here it is.
In my dream I'm in the backyard of my best friend from grade school, Casey Rudd's, house. She has this crazy pond with a land bridge that crosses to a stretch of trees and then an open field. I haven't been to Casey's parent's house in many years so the fact I was there is strange to me. So here I am in my dream, I look up and there is Paw Paw. On the land bridge. He looks at me and I yell, "Hey Paw Paw. Wait for me." He turns and starts walking to the trees. Of course I run after him and in my brain think this is crazy he's dead but I follow. So Paw Paw hasn't said anything to me as of yet in this dream but I follow him through the trees and to the open field where he stops. (keep in mind paw paw has never been at my friend's house so it is kind of weird he is here....) But back to the dream, he stops and I catch up to him and say, "Paw Paw I haven't seen you in for ever. I miss you so much." He looks down at me and says, "Floss, Don't fall." and... that's it. I wake up. That's all. It was so real. I have no idea what this means. I know God still speaks through dreams and visions but I don't know... was this from God? I feel I'm going to have to wait this one out and find out the meaning.
Call me crazy if you like but it was good to see him, Paw Paw. I know this sounds crazy... but in my dream I really felt him there. It was like Paw Paw was back with his hat, blue shirt and blue britches. For a brief moment. He was alive... and ... well... it was nice. And I feel ridiculous even admitting that but it's true. It was almost as though I had one more conversation with him. Will I dream about him again? I don't know but i sure hope so.

A Truck (and it's not a Toyota!)

2010-04-27T21:14:00.000-04:00

It's big, green, old, loud, rusted and has been around my entire life. It's a truck. Not just any truck but my daddy's 1978 GMC Sierra Farm truck. It's amazing. It's any redneck's dream. The rust and the exhaust system is amazing. As a kid I could hear when my daddy would turn off of Mary's Grove Church Rd (about half a mile up the road) coming home from a fire or watch it fly up the road with it's red light flashing going to a fire. Or be excited to see him pick me up from school because riding in the truck was special. I sat up high, I could see everything and it had those mini side windows that could be opened just a little to allow dust and air to blow in your face at first but then clear for a refreshing breeze. Or riding in the back letting the wind blow through your hair. Not to mention the hours sitting on the tail gate shucking corn. But Saturday I was brought back to my favorite truck memory of all memories; loading up the truck and going to the dump. I know what you're thinking. What's so great going to the dump? Well, let me explain. There is a recycling bin (where you separate the cans, brown bottles, green bottles, clear class bottles, milk cartons, etc.. but now you can throw it all in one bin and not separate but that's beyond the point) and the entire process of throwing bags of trash into the bigger bin is fun! Saturday morning my daddy comes driving up in the yard in Big Green. Going to the dump! So here we are... Daddy's driving and I'm in the passenger seat and suddenly I feel 10 again. I feel like a little kid heading to the dump. Not a care in the world, no worries, no problems, just going to the dump. I was at a place where everyone I loved was still alive and nothing was out of reach. One Truck. It's old. And sometimes it won't start. I know this may sound crazy but... it's a part of me.

Easter Intro 2010

2010-04-26T14:41:00.000-04:00

I know you are probably tired of the videos I post from church... but they are all so good... i can't help but not share. This is a video that opened the Easter Service this year! Powerful... as always

Elevation Easter Experience: Opening Video from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

Summer Book

2010-04-20T14:15:00.000-04:00

Last night I had the opportunity to meet with my Costa Rica Momma and Two girls I will be spending the summer with serving missionary teams. Just from our initial conversations I am extremely excited about what the stories this summer is going to birth. The changes in our lives are going to be unmeasurable, the conversations with Erin are going to be book worthy, and the jokes will be priceless. I think the best thing so far is the excitement in Erin's eyes at the mention of a battery powered hairdryer. Does anyone know where I can get one... is there a such thing? But I think I will write a daily entry in my journal and then record each day on a separate blog... once I get back to the world of electricity... and then somehow get it printed as a book. This summer is going to rock my world.... as always... but the best is yet to come!

Carowinds

2010-04-19T11:23:00.000-04:00

Last Friday I was given the opportunity to drive the 8th Grade Band to Carowinds for Music in The Park. The band played for 10 minutes and rode rides for 5 hours. Meaning, I listened to the competition for 10 minutes and rode rides for 5 hours too! The Intimidator is amazing!!!! The best ride at the park. I lost my gum on it. So fast, so smooth, and so fun!!

Growth

2010-04-15T22:51:00.000-04:00

The difference a year can make!

The amount of growth that occurs in a year is amazing. Once we hit a certain age the physical growth stops (well it's supposed to). But there is some growth that should never stop.. spiritual. So my question is are you the same as you were a year ago? Or are you busting out of the hat like Payton?

P.S... take a look at her right hand.... weird huh?

Watch and Laugh!

2010-04-14T14:33:00.000-04:00

Elevation Easter Experience: Announcements from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

Spring Break

2010-04-12T08:35:00.003-04:00

The week has come and past which means one thing, summer break is 8 weeks away!!!!!!!! Can you believe it? I can't wait. But I will say this past week was a little difficult. Driving up to my grandpaws and not having Sandra there was a little awkward. Driving up at my parent’s house, seeing the chairs set up in Paw Paw's backyard made me think how his chair will be empty this summer, which brought me to tears. And I really started to think about Maw Maw and Paw Paws house. It’s the same house. The exterior looks the same, the inside looks the same (except cleaner!), and the same chairs in the same spot. But everything is different. The entire atmosphere is different. Which I think goes to prove it's not the physical things that join us together. It's the people and relationships we have in our lives.
On a lighter note, I was over at maw maw's when my aunts were cleaning out the closets and let me tell you... i have never in my life seen so many pairs of new socks in plastic packages. Not even the Wal-Mart shelves have this many socks. It was hilarious!! And Shirts… Holy Moly… At least 25 dress shirts still in the plastic wrap or gift box. Never opened. All of these things were gifts people gave him he never used. I even remember as a kid seeing him open presents on Father's Day, Christmas, and His birthday and his response being... I don't need this. Well, he didn't. But the question is... what to do with all the White Tube socks?

Check IT!!!!

2010-04-01T21:05:00.001-04:00

surprise!

2010-03-31T14:22:00.000-04:00

I receive a phone call in my classroom today from the front desk lady informing me I need to come to the front of the office. The entire time I am on the phone with her I hear a cow mooing in the background, so of course I blurt out.. "why do I hear a cow?" The office secretary informs me the cow noise is coming from my package... that's right folks.. I had a box in the front office that moos!!! Well to make it short, my momma mailed me an easter box (not basket) and it has chocolate, gum, animal crackers, trail mix (all my standard foods) and a cow that moos every time you push the head down.... AND... every time you push the head down it POOPS candy!!

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love it ;D

one great momma I have!

Last Years Easter Opening Video

2010-03-28T16:32:00.000-04:00

Elevation Church Easter Opener from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

This was the opening video for Easter.... can't wait for next weeks!!!

Easter at Elevation!

2010-03-27T09:32:00.001-04:00

Easter 2010 Trailer from Elevation Worship on Vimeo.
I have orange egg tickets it you want one!!!
It's going to be huge!

Summer is Coming

2010-03-25T11:22:00.000-04:00

The past two summers I have spent weeks in the Jungle of Central America. Each year I leave and I have a gut feeling I will be returning the next summer, or knowing this is not my last time here. In February I was beginning to accept the fact I would not be going this summer because of GOP dates changing and money. BUT... little did I know what was to come. 2 weeks ago I get an email asking if I will intern the summer to help run the center. The center is complete, functional, hosting groups (not just people in missionary training living in craziness) high notch and open for people. Of course I said, Heck Yes... meaning June 19th- August 6th is so long USA hello Pura Vida! Start praying now... for funds and God's continual movement on the mountain!

to be a mountain stream

2010-03-24T11:43:00.001-04:00

I'm always amazed at people’s actions and responses to situations. I think it's easy to profess Christ and live Him out when all is good. But when things don't happen the way we want or when people don't behave the way we think they should how easy it is to not respond in the way He would. How easy the enemy sneaks in and starts his work. The enemy is sneaky. He is out to kill and destroy. Take every thought captive. Identify where this is coming from. Why did you think that? Was that thought from God? Never allow a thought to take you captive! But take your thoughts captive and strangle them with the word. The truth! There are no perfect people. I'm for sure not perfect... not even spitting distance from perfect... but I pray that in my mistakes and repentance my response will be out of love. Even when the world is against me I hang on to the truth I know and react in a way to please Christ; a reaction out of love and forgiveness. To never allow bitterness and rage in. The word says you can't have fresh and salt water from the same stream.

How was your day?

2010-03-23T14:42:00.003-04:00

Here is a quote for you...
"when you do what everyone else does, you can't do what no one else does."
I challenge you to be different. Don't try to fit the status quo. Be different. Whether that is in your friendships, attitudes, methods, or general outlook. Be different!

What I learned yesterday! love elevation

2010-03-22T08:33:00.001-04:00

Rarely do I ever retype my notes from church. I usually write them on the journaling side of my bible and refer to them as refrence when I read the passage again. But... I want to share what I learned. If you want to hear the entire sermon you can listen to it HERE later today!

Have you ever walked into a place that you can tell that something supernatural is about to take place? You just sense the divine anticipation of what God is going to do. And, then in similar places, you don’t get the same sense of the Holy Spirit. We just started calling this factor, “IT.” We wanted to look into this IT factor.” Here are some characteristics of IT:

God makes IT happen. IT is for Him and from Him.
We cannot manufacture, create, or reproduce IT. IT is not something that one person can bring, but the wrong people can kill IT.
IT is the work of God. IT is not a model, system, paradigm, or a result of a program. IT is not based on the style of worship or building.
IT has an upside- lives are changed. IT has a down side- IT attracts critics; people will misunderstand and misquote IT.
IT happens, but often times, IT doesn’t, even with faithful people and leaders.

You have to keep it. 2 Timothy 1:14

This is the most important thing...you (as individuals) must keep it. You must guard the special work of God in your life. When you have that raw faith that God can save anyone, it is attractive. When you can hear it in your voice and see it in your eyes, it is attractive and people are drawn to it.
You must keep it! Here is the danger: when God blesses you with a big ministry, it’s easy to skim over personal devotion, lose your own passion, and start to fake it. You can allow the momentum of the crowd to carry you.
You cannot lose the power of your first love, Jesus Christ! You cannot lose the passion around the main thing.
God is not pleased with part-time disciples. If you want to find your life, you must lose it all. You must guard. You cannot take for granted the power and grace of God.

Don’t be afraid to fail. (Matthew 25:24-25)

Failure is not an option, it is an absolute necessity. You will grow and learn more through failures than through successes.
Some of our biggest successes were born out of failures. We often learn how to make it better through failure. The massive failure in one area allowed more success to come.
Failure is the first step to real success. Failure is when God speaks to you with clarity. He will do something in you before He does something through you when you fail.
Peter is a great example; who failed more than Peter? He failed greatly, was forgiven greatly, and was empowered to preach at Pentecost.
Failure is an event, not a person. Just because you fail at something doesn’t mean you are a failure. So, do not be afraid to fail.

Dear God,

2010-03-19T11:23:00.002-04:00

God you have been so good to me. You show me my wrongs. You make it all right. You work in ways I don't understand. But Lord, gaurd me from anger today fill me with peace. Lord i need your strength today. I can't make it right... I've done all you said I could do. It's broken and can only be fixed by your hand.
Thank you Lord for your promises.

Mr. Jones had no idea what he was really saying

2010-03-16T14:03:00.000-04:00

Mr. Jones was my Algebra and Geometry teacher in high school. He was full of "educational sayings" and memorable quotes. One of the quotes he would say on a daily basis was... keep your eyes on the prize. At the time the "prize" was graduation, but now that i'm older (physically and spiritually) I realize the prize is much bigger than graduation. The prize is God.
Paul reminds us to run the good race; to race towards the finish line. But I think the image of peter on the water is even better. When Peter was focused on Christ he walked on water, but once his focus shifted to what was around him he began to sink, but then he called for help and Jesus pulled him back up.
I feel my focus in past couple weeks has shifted. I started to look around me. Started to notice the world. Entertained a thought, preformed an action and began to sink. I didn't keep my eyes on the prize. I allowed the enemy to sneak in. I allowed the enemy to distract. I allowed the enemy to allow me to sink. So, what do you do? The only thing you can do... repent (to turn from your ways). Meaning, I turned my focus back to God, cried out like Peter. I put my eyes back on the Prize and allow him to pull me up. But keep in mind when you sink.. you get wet. You hurt people and you can't change to fact you were drowning. But it takes time to dry off. It takes time to completely heal. But isn't it good to know there is a God who will pull you up. Dry you off. And forgive the fact you looked away.

So... Keep your eyes on the Prize!!

sorry

2010-03-14T21:28:00.000-04:00

sometimes the only thing you can do is ask for forgiveness and even then it doesn't seem like enough.

a thought

2010-03-10T13:56:00.000-05:00

Don't view the world or people in different parts of the world by a standard of what you think they don't have. See each life, each place, each situation in such as way of what they do have. Sometimes what they do have is so much more than what we think they don't have.

paw paw verses

2010-03-04T14:53:00.001-05:00

It has been a comfort knowing that my brother, my momma, my aunts, and even my cousins still tear up every now and again.... or every couple of days... when we stop and think about Paw Paw. So, last Saturday I went home and for the first time since the funeral stopped by the cemetery to just sit. My entire life I would see someone in a cemetery and think why do they want to just go and sit there? Well, let me just say I have learned the reason. It helps. Just sitting there. While I was sitting there I jotted down some words. At first I wasn't going to post them, but then I figured I'd need to so I don't loose them and hey... maybe you'll want to add a line or two.

He put others first and himself last.
Lived out the Word everyday that past.

He had wisdom I always wanted to know
And shared lessons he thought I should learn

Hands callused from hard work
And skin damaged by his life in the sun

He was my best friend.
I learned how to live, how to love, how to work and how to play from him.

He never said those 3 little words
But I knew he loved me by what he does

Not asking for anything but giving it all away.
I still miss him every single day.

I still see his smile and the way it lights up a room.
Or him up in Big John plowing the ground from summer corn.

Leaded back in a chair under the shade of a pecan tree on a summer night
Or taking a nap after a trip to the chamber tuckered him out.

Somehow always having time to listen to me
Or sit in silence and listen to the breeze.

Watching cars go up and down the road dreaming about a Tacoma I wished to own.

You created a Name worth carrying on
One without shame, blemish, or scars

I think I am who am today because of who you were in the life you lived each day.

He was my biggest fan, my best friend, and would give anything to have him back again.

more and better

2010-03-03T08:26:00.000-05:00

Check out Pastor Furtick's blog today. More and Better. It resonated with me and I hope it does the same with you!
Click on the link below:
www.stevenfurtick.com

Friends

2010-02-25T14:46:00.000-05:00

We all have them. They people who know you the best. The people who tell you the truth and the people who are there for you no matter what you are going through. The ones where you don't need to say anything and feel completely comfortable, and along those lines, not speak to in forever and pick up where you left off. They understand. They Listen. They comfort. I have to say I have some good friends. It wasn't until recently that I found out who my friends were. You think you know who they are, but your true friends show up when you need them the most. I have great friends. Some of the best. So here is to you. Thank you! You'll never know what you mean to me.

2 months

2010-02-23T22:56:00.001-05:00

Its almost been 2 months since paw paw died and it still hurts. I'm not going to fib or sugar coat it. It hurts. I randomly start to think about spring strawberry picking or summer corn and i start to cry. Or I pick up the phone and Paw Paw's number is still listed. Walk in Maw Maw's and not see him sitting in the recliner. Or just calling the house phone and not hearing him pick up the phone as soon as I start my message and he knows its not a sales man. It's hard. It's still hard. The question is when will it get easier. I feel so silly sometimes just suddenly crying. Out of nowhere tears flow. Some folks don't understand. What's wrong with you? they ask. Why have you been crying? Heather you should be over that by now. Well, I'm sorry. I'm not. Not yet. I still get upset. I still cry. And I still want him back. That's the truth.

Maw Maw's Grocery List (FYI.. She's Diabetic)

2010-02-21T22:06:00.001-05:00

You are reading the list correctly. The sugar free syrup is crossed out and it has been replaced with cookies. Maw Maw goes to the beauty shop once a week and during this time Paw Paw would go to the store and get groceries. As a little girl the list was pretty long. Maw Maw would cook and know what she needed. Then it got to the point where she'd say, "I don't know what to put down.. what's your momma get?" Now it's pretty much waffles, syrup, and coffee, except for today. She has taken the time to let it be known she wants some cookies. This is her entire list. SO I ask when was the last time the only thing you wanted to eat was cookies? Umm.. when you were four or five... right? It's the circle of life my friends. You start in diapers and you end in diapers.

His Power

2010-02-16T13:37:00.000-05:00

I have been reading the Gospel of John this week when I read this passage yesterday and it really spoke to me... Check this out John 9: 1-3 "As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man who had been blind from birth. "Teacher" his disciples asked him, "why was this man born blind? Was it a result of his own sins or those of his parents?" Here's what Jesus has to say... "It was not because of his sins or his parents' sins. He was born blind so the power of God could be seen in him."
WHOA. When I read that I immediately thought of the trials I have had in my life. Or some things I notice that have been unfair to my loved ones or even when I wonder "why this is happening to me?" Here is my answer... so the power of God could be seen. How amazing is that? When my mind or your mind begins to wonder... Lord why did you make me this way? Why does it take me longer to understand? Why am I crippled in this area? Why ... Why... Why... Just know you are made that way purposely. The kicker is allowing His power to be seen! Accepting who you are and letting His power heal/ shine through you!
In case you are wondering... Jesus heals the man later in the chapter with spit and mud!

Feb 14th

2010-02-15T08:37:00.000-05:00

Single Awareness Day. That's the name some people refer to as Valentines Day. There were a couple of years I identified and was well aware of my singleness. For example the long list of names called at the end of the day in high school to pick up flowers and balloons in the cafeteria. OR when you forget it's valentines day, go out to eat, notice all the couples, receive sad looks and then it hits you.... oh yeah you're sitting by yourself on Valentines Day. Those are two examples of my single awareness but the past two years have been different. Once I realized who I was in Christ and the love he has for me I don't need the approval of man's love... but yesterday was Feb 14th. I was at home with my family. I did not even realize what day it was. Sure my momma got me a valentine but the love is always there. I am always shown and given love at home. So, sure I didn't have a quote on quote Valentine, but I do have a never-ending backbone of love at home, my family!

SpUrTs

2010-02-12T11:58:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure about the rest of ya'll but I go through spurts. Heather, what do you mean spurts? You know. Do really well at something for a while, then a distraction comes in, a change in routine, an unfortunate event takes place and suddenly everything is messed up. This happens to me spiritually. Just being honest here folks. There are times when all I want to do dig into His word, journal, stay at rest with him, then something changes and boom its as though my routine is messed up and suddenly my relationship begins to suffer. A practical example is when I was in college if I didn't run in the morning; I wouldn't run at all that day. It wasn't that I didn't have time, but it was I RUN IN THE MORNING. If it's not the morning I don't run. Sounds crazy I know... But it hit me one day... Why not run whenever? Why does it have to be the morning? OR I would think if I didn't have time to run 5 miles what is the point of running at all? Well, needless to say I came to realize even a one mile run is better than nothing. Here is my point. Things happen... life happens. God isn't up on a status quo... an all or nothing, you have to beat your record of time you spent with me and if you don't spend the same amount of time with me each day you're worthless kind of God. I think this sometimes. I think... Gosh... I am slipping because I haven't been in the word today like I was yesterday. Take every thought Captive! Where do you think those thoughts come from? If I don't have time to read the word for 30 min, but have time for 10... Read 10. I think it all comes down to desire. Your desires are what you have to be aware of. Is your desire him or something else? Yes, God gives us desires but our number one, one should be him! Yes I have spurts. When these things occur, I have to realize what is happening to cause these spurts or what is happening to cease these spurts. Do you really think God is going to punish you for not spending as much time in his word because you are serving others?

SO Long.

what comes around

2010-02-10T11:40:00.000-05:00

Several times in my life things have happened and I didn't understand why and several times things have not happened and I didn't understand why. One of the things I have to remind myself is to trust in the one who makes and doesn't make things happen. Trust in the reality he has my best interest at hand. Rest in the knowledge the one who created me and planned out my destiny has it all under control!

changes

2010-02-08T14:34:00.000-05:00

As life progresses change is inevitable. In fact to say there is no change would be a change. I like change. I like for things to be mixed up. For example one of the main reasons I like P90X is because the workouts constantly change and the exercises within the set workout changes as well. Sometimes change is hard though. For example not calling Paw Paw every Wednesday morning is hard. Not living at home around my family is hard at times, especially when there is snow on the ground. Our feelings change constantly. Sometimes I feel sad, happy, hungry, silly, desperate or powerful. I frimly believe feelings are based on a circumstance so change circumsantaces, change feelings. Sometimes our view of people change and we do or we don't know why. A person that was once your friend isn't or someone who you didn't care to be around is now your friend. Sometimes change hurts people, sometimes change encourages people, sometimes change inspires people, and sometimes change discourages people. I also believe change is something that occurs overtime due to an increase in knowledge. What we thought we knew we didn't know. What we didn't know we were lacking in knowing, we now know. I hope to never get to the point where I don't want to change for the better or get stuck in my ways. But here is my take on change, if we ever get to the point we don't accept change we will be left behind.

Foolishness

2010-02-05T11:02:00.000-05:00

"If you aren't willing to look foolish; you are foolish." Excerpt from: In a pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day

I read these words and they stuck with me. How often have I missed out on doing something because I was scared of looking foolish but how foolish is that? I have recently had an athlete not want to play in a game because she was scared of messing up. She was scared of looking foolish. She has missed out on some quality playing time and FUN! When you're young there is that immediate regret over something you may have done right then. As you get older, and granted I'm only now starting to realize this, you have more regret over the things you didn't do than the things you did do. This applies to many areas of life. All of this being said there is no Fear in the Lord. The spirit of Fear is from the enemy. Foolishness is in a matter of perspective. Often one may look at me and think that was foolish, but that individual doesn't see the whole picture. They don't know what I know. The beat of a drum often times sounds different if no other instruments are being played... or can be heard along with it.

Life's a Dance

2010-02-02T21:20:00.002-05:00

I recently heard this old number one hit from I think 1992... maybe... song on the Radio and thought I would share... The good ole John Michael Montgomery song... If you wanna hear the song.. just google Life's a dance.. and listen to it on lala....

When I was fourteen I was falling fast
For a brown (I know it's supposed to be blue eyed but I always change it b/c I have brown eyes!!) eyed girl in my homeroom class
Trying to find the courage to ask her out
Was like trying to get oil from a waterspout
What she would have said I can't say
I never did ask and she moved away
But I learned something from my brown eyed girl
Sink or swim you gotta give it a whirl

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

The longer I live the more I believe
You do have to give if you wanna recieve
There's a time to listen, a time to talk
And you might have to crawl even after you walk
Had sure things blow up in my face
Seen the longshot, win the race
Been knocked down by the slamming door
Picked myself up and came back for more

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Take a chance on love
Life's a dance
You learn as you go

14 years later

2010-01-30T23:43:00.002-05:00

14 years ago I'm not sure if y'all remember North Carolina had a big ole snow. One that blanketed the state. That very same year Hurricane Fran hit... but that's a different story. Anyway, we were all buried in snow, the best snow to fall in 8 years and the first big snow I really remember not being afraid I would die from sledding. My brother and I shared a red plastic sled. One that looked new due to lack of use from living in a southern state. SO, the snow started to fall that January night and we looked out the window in all kinds of anticipation for school to be cancelled and fun to begin. The next morning when we woke up we found the best sledding snow we had ever known. It had a thin layer of sleet on top making it slicker than a bald tire semi on a wet road. My daddy took to the mountain behind the house with the tractor and began to pack down a nice slope on the field for us to go down. All my cousins walked across the field and we walked up the mountain to sled. Due to the fact a rudder sled was useless on this kind of snow, Kevin and I were the only ones to have a sled that seemed to slide right. Here we were six kids ranging from ages 16-3, a dog, 3 adults, one red plastic sled, a huge hill (seriously it's like a mtn!), and a day to slide! We all took turns on the sled. Going down and walking up. Of course Abbie and Matt were young so they went down with one of us older ones, or sometimes we would go down in pairs, but the fun way to go down was solo on your belly. Just you, the sled, the snow, the speed, and the cold. It was great. Except for the 5-7 minute walk back up the mountain, the wait for your turn, and the cold hitting your bones. After about an hour we see the tractor waiting at the bottom of the mountain with the front end loader intact and Paw Paw in the heated cab. He became our own personal ski lift. We would sled down, get in the front of the loader, and he would haul us back up the mountain to drop the sled off for the next person.
14 years later. I'm away. Not on the farm. Not playing with my cousins playing in the snow. I so badly want to go home, but even home is changing. We are all getting older. We are all having our ever changing lives. Can you have roots and wings? I don't know. Today brought back a good memory yet at the same time brought me to tears... again. I miss Paw Paw.

Women

2010-01-29T13:39:00.002-05:00

I have copied some wisdom I recently read. I'm not quite sure who wrote it but I thought I would share. Comment and let me know what you think!... I know what is written below is true but I'm not quite sure about the rest of ya'll i need the reminder every once and a while!

Women have to be perfect. To be loved and noticed is the desire of every woman. To actually feel loved, noticed and desired is a feeling that eludes every woman i know. We can never be "good enough" or we are "too much." We must submit to men, yet we need to be strong in order to survive. Survival of the fittest- and in the world of a woman if you are not literally the fittest, most beautiful, or talented, then you should probably just give up and settle for the best that's offered. Why is this? Why does it seem impossible for women to find that "balance" of perfection? What is the definition of perfection? As the world has taught me, I would define the perfect woman as strikingly beautiful. From head to toe this woman turns the heads of both genders. She has flawless skin, soft, sexy hair, a subtle tan, bright, captivating eyes, muscle tone, but not manly, slim and tall, but short enough to rock a pair of heels. The irony is that every woman finds flaw in their unique perfection. The world has somehow created this image that resembles no REAL woman and inspired real women to strive to change themselves to fit the image. Even when we have flawless skin, or a gorgeous body, there is always a freckle in the wrong place, we're too 'cubby' or our boobs are too small, or.... there's a million things women come up with. But WHY? I once sat in a room full of girls my age as we were instructed to close our eyes and repeat to ourselves, "I am the most beautiful woman in the world," over and over in our heads. As we still imagined and repeated this to ourselves, the instructor told us to open our eyes and look at the girls around us while still telling ourselves, "I am the most beautiful woman in the world." The confidence, beauty, and radiance i saw on the face of every woman was unlike anything i've seen before. There was not a lady in the room who was not smiling. We each, individually, for a small moment, were perfect. Loved. Wanted. Powerful. That, I believe, may be the key to the perfect woman. Individuality. EVERY woman is perfect. Each created differently, so uniquely, that there is no other woman in the world who is like them. No one woman can fit the mold of another. THANK YOU OH MY GOD that i never have to compare myself to any other woman but myself. Because I am ME. There is no other woman that can be me, and there is no other woman whose mold i can fit. Therefor, God, THANK YOU that I am PERFECTLY ME. "I AM the most beautiful woman in the world." Try constantly thinking this while surrounded by other women and insecurities disappear as we embrace, BECOME, and LOVE exactly who we were made to be.